Overwhelmed at times

Husband59

I am caring for my wife of 46 years. Her moderate Alzheimer's is progressing every month. Her 2 medications may be working, bit I can't really tell. My emotional and physical albitites are taxed at times. I can continue this hectic pace but feel the need to reach out for help. Any suggestions? My cousin did offer respite care which I may take her up on. When they say, "You need some "me" time," I feel guilty!

annie51

Guilt is a strange and powerful feeling and I am the queen of guilt. But after caring for my husband for 4 years now, I realize that “me” time will help me be a better caregiver and companion for him. So it isn’t selfish at all.
Definitely take your cousin’s offer of respite care, and any other offers you get! I have started bringing in a paid companion a couple times a week. The other option is to look at adult day care options in your area. I haven’t yet had success with that for my DH, but it would be some valuable time to yourself. It is an overwhelm thing that we’re doing!

trottingalong

I too went through the guilt stage. Now I realize I do need to care for me also, and that means breaks of some sort. I’m lucky that I have an established routine of leaving the house everyday for two hours to care for my horse. My husband can still handle that. I don’t know what I will do when he can’t. I can also walk in our very small neighborhood or take my dog out back to throw the ball. Even the smallest of breaks helps me.

Chance Rider

One of my favorite quotes is “You can’t pour from an empty cup”. I know for myself I am a better caregiver when I practice self care, and that includes me-time.
For now I can leave my husband unattended for several hours at a time though when that changes I’ll bring in paid help.
Take your cousin up on her offer and try not to feel guilty. Taking care of you isn’t selfish.

Melrob1

Guilt is my middle name! I have a part time care giver. Can you afford one to give you a small break? Kids that can help? I give this advice, but, I'm horrible at taking it. I'm the queen of guilt. My caregiver is here while I'm at work, than I take over . Honestly, being on this support site is the best I've felt mentality in 9 years. Stay here. Feel our love and support. Reach out to family that offers to help. Practice sanity. I'm going to practice what I preach, too, with all of your help.

SDianeL

welcome. This is the place for info and support. We understand how you feel. Read the book “The 36 Hour Day” if you haven’t already. It helped after my husband’s diagnosis. Check into your county agency on aging. They may have day care available for more respite. Definitely take your family member’s offer. Take care of yourself so you can care for her.