Update on bringing DH home from Memory Care

tucson anne

It has now been 6 days since I brought my husband home from memory care, and he has regained quite a bit of the ground he lost during the 2 weeks there. He is more able to walk since he is walking in the house without a walker so strengthening his leg muscles (can't fix the really bad knees). His initial confusion about where he was and even who I am has gone. He is back to being the even tempered and cheery person he was. His sundowning, such as it is, is more pronounced. He simply has no idea what to do, abandons various tv options (sports, music, history videos ) pretty quickly, so the main problem that caused me to place him (other than worrying about what would happen if I became ill), which is what to do with his time, still exists. He vacuumed for a while this morning; I'm saving a pile of towels to fold; I ordered a guy kind of fidget toy (knobs, levers). We tried a sticker book and that was a failure; he can't do puzzles, word search; doesn't like coloring. He does need more help with toileting but so far except for the first time in the morning totally missing the toilet, he's doing okay. A thin toilet rug and a pile of towels seems to soak up the night's urine. And he is creakier on the stairs going down (3 of them) so I watch like a hawk. He's been fine with 2 caregivers two mornings the first week; seemed to recognize them.

I'm glad I brought him home and I have to stress it wasn't the facility, it was him; not a good fit. They were very compassionate and helpful. I just couldn't take the sobbing😥 Now I just need to hang in until he deteriorates enough for one of the very nice small 10 person homes not far from my house (good caregiver ratios/good space/no activities to speak of).

SDianeL

Thank you for the update. So glad he's home and doing well. 💜

tonyac2

“until he deteriorates enough for one of the very nice small 10 person homes not far from my house (good caregiver ratios/good space/

I’m just curious, why does he need to be in worse shape to go into one of the little homes? I have to see if we have anything like that in my area. Minneapolis. Thanks.

tucson anne

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/252230#Comment_252230

Because he still needs activities, which they mostly don't have. Also, I think he will forget me at some point which will lessen the sorrow for him.

Jgirl57

Good to hear you are both doing well. Thank you for sharing

lenbury

Sounds very familiar to me. I brought my wife home after 12 days and supplemented with home health care folks. Now, after 18 months we are in an assisted living facility that offers memory care. I am not sure what the future will bring but recently the sun downing has gotten much worse and I am having trouble getting someone to prescribe Seroquel or something that might help.