Support Groups for DH

CydS

Hello Again - I have found so much support for me, as a spouse of a DH, but not so much for my husband, or for the both of us to attend. He is still at a stage where he might benefit from others' perspectives.

Mostly, I'm looking for outside validation for things like driving…

Warmly,
—CydS

JDancer

What stage is he? A support group wouldn't have helped my husband at any stage, but your DH may be different.

Is he still driving? PWD are impaired and IMO should never drive. If he had an accident, you (both) could be sued for everything you own. Please don't allow him to drive, lives may depend on it.

SDianeL

even in early stages the ability to reason may be lost. He doesn’t have the ability to understand he is impaired. I doubt having others telling him will help but if you want to try, you can call the toll free number for the Alzheimer’s Assn. the number is at the top of the main page. They may have resources in your area or be able to help you get him to stop driving. I got my husband to give me his keys by telling him if he was in an accident even if it wasn’t his fault that we could be sued and lose everything. The next morning he gave me his keys and never drove again. You could also ask his doctor to tell him he shouldn’t be driving. Sometimes they will listen to their doctors. Many PWDs have visuospatial difficulties judging distance and speed. That’s why the Neuro Psychologist told me no driving immediately after his diagnosis.

harshedbuzz

@CydS

There are way more support groups for cargivers than for PWD, although some organizations do sponsor Memory Cafes which are open to both for social interaction. I'm not sure whether there would be a frank exchange of perspective from the other PWD who will likely be further along in the progression of the disease and likely suffer from anosognosia.

In the context of anosognosia, driving is a hot button topic as many PWD think they're rocking their IADLs nicely. Bringing the topic up among those who feel similarly might not work the way you'd hope and could be upsetting for other care-partner couples. FWIW, driving was a hot button topic for my dad. Early on it lead to considerable agitation and aggression. It did improve in the later stages, but he never got thinking her was fine to drive. The very last conversation I had with the man, hours before he died, was about me bringing his car to the MCF so he'd have wheels in case he needed to go somewhere.

HB