Just trying to stay alive through this nightmare

jomarie1951

I haven’t been active here, where I do need to be because I just got out of the hospital. I was unable to eat for 4 days and lost another 10 pounds from vomiting, diarrhea, and dry heaving. I’m now at 75 pounds. I see my primary tomorrow. DH has been so mean and cruel. I am broken and grieving the loss of 54 years of marriage. I know it’s the disease but it’s not helping me. I find solace with my newly registered support dog, Gracie (photo attached). I am trying to catch up with all the posts because I need to be here where I can release emotions and realize I am NOT alone.? Thank you, dear friends for allowing me to vent. I am still on a bland diet and hope the banana and cream of wheat stay town. DH had steak and eggs. I am trying to ignore and keep silent around him because he seems to enjoy laughing at me and calling me a skinny disgusting b***h. He says I’m getting what I deserve.

Just trying to stay alive before this disease kills me. My prayers and thoughts are with you all.

Chris20cm

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/74341/just-trying-to-stay-alive-through-this-nightmare

Living with that sort of hostility while attempting to recover from your own health challenges, has to be intolerable for you.
My DW was also very hostile until the Dr put her on Seroquel, which is an anti psychotic medication also known as Quetiapine. That improved the hostility and has continued to be effective for the past 7-8 years.

You are very courageous. The people on this forum understand and appreciate your strength, and care more than you know.

Gracie is beautiful, and must be a wonderful source of mutual unconditional love for you.

Dio

Big hug to you! We understand and feel your pain. Hope your husband can get the medication to calm his behavior. Although we know it's the disease, what we're faced with is reality and hard to reconcile. Do what you can to ignore mean comments. They're just words, nothing more. Hugs…

easy23

Gracie is so cute! Good luck with your primary tomorrow. My husband is on risperidone and depakote for behavioral problems. They have helped a lot.

Biggles

Gracie looks so cute. I was in a desperate place 14 months ago and I got Milo now 15 months old. he too is a registered support dog I take him everywhere and he licks my tears away and wraps his long neck around me. We were walking in the garden at 5.30am this morning a little bit of solice before DH got up. Be as strong as you can try ear plugs they work and can’t be seen!

Chance Rider

I’m so sorry that the disease is taking such a heavy toll on you and your DH. Gracie is absolutely adorable! I have an unofficial support dog, a 100 lb German Shepherd who is my constant companion. I truly don’t know what I’d do without him. I hope you consider meds for your DH to help with his behavior. Please try to take good care of yourself.
~Eve

jomarie1951

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/256017#Comment_256017

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/256017#Comment_256017

Milo is so adorable! Gracie Aldi licks my tears away - catches every single one! I haven’t taken her anywhere yet because I’m waiting for her ID registration which should arrive in the next couple days. I was actually thinking about ear plugs as DH was rambling on when I was making his dinner shaming me got everything. You stay strong too. Thank you for your reply ♥️

jomarie1951

Hi Eve, DH is on memantine and doxycycline. It seems to help for a few days and then we’re back where we started. Through this wonderful lifesaving group I have learned to stop making things worse and just keep completely silent and not reactive to his meanness and cruelty. Not sure he knew what to do after Achilles he started slamming doors and wandering and making the verbally abusive comments. Staying hoarded up with Prime TV in our spare room with Gracie. Thank you for your support and kindness. It’s so refreshing!

jomarie1951

Thank you. I’m going to mention some of the drugs mentioned here to his primary. Will make a call to their office when I return from my appointment tomorrow.

JulietteBee

@jomarie1951, Doxycyline is an antibiotic! Is he being treated for an infection, UTI perhaps? If so, it could explain his meanness.

WIGO23

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/74341/just-trying-to-stay-alive-through-this-nightmare

I do not face the hostility you do but occasionally get accused of causing DH’s problems or called names. While I try to tell myself it is the disease talking, it hurts anyway. I think you are amazingly strong.

Chance Rider

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/256024#Comment_256024

It looks like my husband might be prescribed Memantine in addition to the Donepezil that he’s been taking for a couple of months. A VA pharmacist does a phone call check up with us once a month and during today’s call mentioned the Memantine. We’re seeing his neurologist later this month and will see what she recommends.

I hope you’re taking good care of yourself and enjoying time well spent with Gracie.
~Eve

SDianeL

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/256181#Comment_256181

the VA prescribed Memantine for my husband but I saw no difference. They said it might help his attention span.

Chance Rider

@SDianeL
I can’t say that I’ve noticed any change since my husband has been taking the Donepezil but he thinks it helps. With that in mind I’m sure we’ll have him try the Memantine too. Initially he had adverse side effects with the Donepezil but those subsided.

Thanks for your input, it helps keep me realistic.