Exhausted and feeling Overwelmed

yardman49

Just finished breakfast with my DW after a no sleep night filled with her nonstop talking , yelling at the imaginary people in our house, wandering, looking for "stolen" items and occasional outbursts of anger and aggression. My efforts to distract her constantly failed.

She has calmed down now at approx 8 Am for our breakfast. My DW was officially diagnosed with late onset Alzheimers 2 weeks ago and it seems she is increasing with frequency and intensity of dementia symptoms since then. My DW had a stroke a year ago and she has been progressing steadily downhill since the brain operation. I am her sole caregiver and it is becoming a real challenge with no close friends to call upon and no family close by to help.

Her primary care doctor prescribed some anxiety medication, but she has refused to take it.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

annie51

I have come to believe that a peson cannot do this alone. I, too, have no family close by and just a few friends near us. I ended up hiring a companion caregiver for DH for 2 hours, 2 days a week and even that small amount of time was a well needed break. There is also the adult day care option if you have that in your area.

It sounds like she definitely needs some medication at this point. DH’s PCP did prescribe something for him but many on this forum suggest a geriatric psychiatrist for meds. When DH wouldn’t take his meds, I hid it in his food. Many suggest crushing them and putting them in pudding or applesauce. The MC where DH is now put it in chocolate milk and he drinks it right up.

We’re with you here! It’s a hard road but knowing that so many others truly understand what you’re going through is very comforting.

tboard

caring for someone with dementia is exhausting on the good days. Many medications can be crushed. Check the labels, ask your pharmacist. If they can be crushed put them in her food. Put them in pudding or applesauce. That is how I get anti-depressants and anxiety meds in my DH. He often refuses medications. He isn’t capable of making decisions for himself so I make them for him.

tonyac2

Vanilla Ice Cream is the ticket for my DH. He refused applesauce and pudding, but gulps down the ice cream. I’m crushing his meds as he started chewing them awhile back. Staying one step ahead is tiring also.

midge333

Seroquel would likely help with her agitation and sleep disruption.

Metta

I have no suggestions, just hugs to you and wishing you relief in whatever form you can find. We all need help.

Seroquel/Quetiapine helped my DH.

CindyBum

Oh boy. Been there. Big hugs.

I agree with the crushing the pills and hiding them in something sweet that she likes to eat.

Hang in there! If you can swing it, I hope you can find someone to hire to help you now and again. Respite is important!

SDianeL

I got my husband to take new meds by telling him the doctor said they would help his brain.

Karen711

So sorry Yardman, sending hugs, I get the exhaustion. I agree with Annie, if there’s any possible way to get some help- do it. It’s true even a couple of hours here and there can make a world of difference. My wife (with Alz) will not take pills either, but has a crazy sweet tooth now that I can take advantage of. I’ve crushed seroquel and put it in her ice cream cone. It was hard for me to be consistent with that because she’s often in the kitchen and it’s been hard to “sneak”. This isn’t for everybody, but she is HAPPY to take a low dose gummy and so far this seems to be helping with her sundowner’s angst and anger. At bedtime I’ve been giving her a gummy that also has CBN in it which is supposed to help with sleep. I think this is helping her as well.
Here’s wishing you and your DW a better nights sleep!

Karen

Abby627

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/74434/exhausted-and-feeling-overwelmed

Seroquel saved my life. Most definitely start your DW on something. I would have lost my mind if I hadn’t gotten some relief. DH takes 25 mg every night along with Donepezil and Memantine. He sleeps like a baby.

tonyac2

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/256901#Comment_256901

Karen - I’m onboard with the gummies. As soon as my DH starts resisting getting ready for the day, he gets a gummy. It’s amazing how they regulate his mood and agitation.

persevere

Hey yardman, right there with you. Alone, kids too far. Got a sister in law right up the street who’s useless. So, get some help, get some serequol, and get some temazepam for sleep for her. I used care.com and found someone very flexible that gives me a few hours 3 days a week to work in the yard or run errands, etc.