Becoming mean

sarahjanefellmanboss

My mom is 90, currently in independent living apartment. She picked the facility 10 years ago so she could access transitional help as she aged. I believe she is in the latter part of early stage dementia. The last year she bas become very argumentative with everyone … fired one cleaning service and “hates” the new one. The food service is “disgusting” …. The social worker called me concerned because now mom is sending nasty notes. She had seen a counselor late last year but says she doesn’t need that now. Saw doctor last week after I called him with concern with growing anger and unhappiness with everything. He prescribed new meds but she won’t take them. It’s been cycles of crisis (sobbing) and then ignoring it happened. I am frustrated because trying to calmly discuss things, she brushes it off and the we move on to the next “incident” or issue. Vicious circle that I cannot find a way out of. She refuses outside help.

SDianeL

welcome. Sorry about the reason you are here. Your Mom has Anosognosia which is a condition in which a person with a disability is cognitively unaware of having it. As I learned here, you can’t reason with someone whose reasoner is broken. Many PWDs refuse outside help. Try a fib that she may accept. Like the person needs a job or is working their way through school or needs credits. Talk to the pharmacist to see if her meds can be crushed and put in her food. Applesauce works great for that. Will the facility do that? It may be time to consider moving her to MC. They are better trained to care for PWDs. Read the book “The 36 Hour Day” which helped me understand the disease.