in stage 8 after a fall

Jo124c

My wonderful husband passed last Thursday near midnight. He had been experiencing some episodes of lashing out toward the staff of his memory care home (utterly unlike any behaviors before) and I had met with executive staff who thought because he'd had a week with out of town visitors, being taken to golf range, etc. he was 'overstimulated'. The MC has two doctors…a psychiatrist and a primary care doctor, both coming on site a few times a month. The primary care ordered depakote and noted it was causing some side effects. Gary had some other incidents, they called me at night and my son and I took him to ER who gave us seraquil…The primary care doc doubled his depakote and the psychiatrist was alerted. When I visited him he couldn't walk easily and was mentally confused and his fine motor skills were gone and I had to help him dress. I alerted staff. The psychiatrist ordered respiradone, but didn't review the other meds. which were many. The next day I got a phone call that he had fallen and hit his head and an ambulance was being called. I rushed over and rode with him in the ambulance. They did some assessment and got him to pee for a UTI screen. He had a UTI. He continued to decline and the CT scans showed brain damage from the fall. He never regained consciousness and after a few days it was clear to the hospital staff he was not getting better. I had been researching other placement options so it was overwhelming to be told he would not regain what he had just a few days earlier. The two compassionate female doctors who were attending at the hospital were clear. I agreed to palliative care. My two grandsons flew in and with my son and his wife we organized around the clock sitting with him until he passed. The hospital called hospice. The hospital was excellent in his care as were the medical staff who treated him there. I am grieving and entering stage 8…Gary was in stage 5 when he was overmedicated, undiagnosed with a UTI and fell. - clear

ronda b

Im sorry for your loss.

harshedbuzz

@Jo124c

I am so sorry for the loss of your dear husband.

HB

tonyac2

So sorry for your loss.

Chance Rider

@Jo124c I’m so sorry for your loss.

midge333

I am sorry for your loss. Please be kind to yourself.

CindyBum

I am so sorry for you loss. I'm so glad you have your family gathered around you.

Biggles

That is all so sad. Your care and understanding is so evident. No matter how, when or where the time comes, after such a caring relationship for each other it’s going to be traumatic. He will be sadly missed and you will grieve. Thankyou for sharing I am afraid of the end and reading your journey strangely gives me a little bit of courage.

JeriLynn66

I’m so sorry for the loss of your dear husband. Holding you close in prayer ❤️

suvi

I’m very sorry for your loss.

jgreen

God bless you @Jo124c and your family.

Metta

My heart breaks for you and your family. Everything about dementia is so cruel. Wishing you strength and peace.

wose

I’m so sorry for the loss of your DH. It’s so very traumatic when you weren’t expecting it. Please go easy on yourself. Wishing you and your family peace and strength.

SDianeL

so sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. 🙏💜

Victoriaredux

I'm so sorry at the loss of your husband and the whirlwind at the end….no loss is without heartache …sounds like he was physically active fairly close to the end- the driving range etc —I hope that, in time, is a tiny comfort he didn't linger for years bedridden . Nothing will remove the sudden shock of his passing but watching stage 7 is brutal. There is no good time to lose a loved one , but sparing pain ... I am grateful the hospital encircled your family with kind understanding and support.

cdgbdr

I am so sorry for your loss. There are no words to express it well. I pray that you find some comfort in the presence of your family.

Marla13

I am so sorry for your loss.