Parent losing a lot of weight

Jacoland

Hi,

My 87 year old LO has vascular dementia, and she is only eating 30% of her food. She has lost 20 pounds 5' 7" 110 lbs. She was at the dentist recently, so her teeth are not bugging her. She is verbal, repeats herself, she can still play cards, the doctor said she is in the middle to late stage of dementia. It is a struggle to get her to shower. She lives at an ALF, but I have her at the house every week for a day or two sometimesmore. This is my first time posting. Any tips on getting her to eat more? I think I might have to go on FMLA to cook for her and bring her food.

​fesk

Hi Jacoland,

I'm sorry to hear this is happening. It's good you know that her teeth are not the issue. I recommend getting her checked by a doctor to see if there are any other issues that might be causing the weight loss. Has she had recent bloodwork, physical, etc?

Is she not finishing the meals in front of her or is she forgetting to eat? It could be she needs more structure if she is forgetting to eat. It could be she needs a different type of food if she is having swallowing issues. Has any of her eating behavior changed? For example, how she is chewing or coughing after drinking water? In addition to having a doctor check her, you could have a swallow study done to see if there are any underlying issues that are causing difficulty with eating.

Losing weight can also be a sign of progression to a later stage but from what you wrote, it doesn't sound as if that is where she is at.

I know someone who is in a facility and was not eating and losing weight. The staff assumed it was progression but it ended up being a medical reason. I would start there.

Jacoland

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/262862#Comment_262862

Thank you so much for your insightful response. She said she does not feel hungry and gets full very fast; she swallows just fine so far. I have a feeling it is a medical issue, too. We just got labs drawn, but then her insurance changed, and I need to find a new provider now. All the best to you. This was very helpful.

BPS

My wife is in memory care and is mostly bedridden. she went to a while of not wanting to eat. She is 5'3" and got down to 86 pounds and was diagnosed with failure to thrive and went on hospice. the hospice nurse made some minor changes to her medications. I don't know if that is the reason but she started eating more again is gaining a little weight back. It started with a maple bar and then some other pastries.

​fesk

You are very welcome.

BPS has a good point too. Any recent medication changes could be a factor.

Please keep us posted.

SDianeL

it might be time to consider memory care. They have specialized care for dementia. ALF (Assisted Living Facility) vs. Memory Care feeding differs mainly in specialization and support ALFs offer standard meals, while memory care provides tailored, distraction-reduced dining with staff trained for cognitive impairment addressing issues like wandering, confusion, or difficulty eating common with dementia, often with flexible schedules and snack options to ensure adequate nutrition and dignity. 

H1235

Just an idea. Could it be she is struggling with the use of utensils? Is the food to complicated for her to eat? I don’t think you can totally trust her comment that she is just not hungry. When people with dementia are faced with a difficult task (cutting up a slice of ham) they may make excuses to avoid the real issue. You might try finger foods to see if you have any luck. Have you tried ensure? Maybe treat her to an ensure milkshake when you visit. I hope you can find something that works.

Jacoland

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/262892#Comment_262892

Wow, good point! I will keep an eye out for that, but she is using utensils just fine. Thank you!

Jacoland

Thank you for sharing.