Emotional aggression

vallan

My husband 81yo has it been formally diagnosed with dementia, although the kids and I suspect it.
He forgets things from a discussion 10 minutes ago. He was an engineer and very smart - now it's me telling him how to do things correctly. He'll get upset that I'm telling him the practical way, so I've begun to just let him fail over and over.
His favorite comment is 'you just love to argue'. Usually later he will recognize he said or did something wrong and tell me he loves me.
These episodes are becoming more frequent. Do I just say 'sorry' immediately even though I didn't get emotionally abusive just to change the mood. Or let him brew and think about it?

vallan

Hasn't been diagnosed

BPS

I think if it is something that don't matter just let him do it his way, correctly can be in the eye of the beholder. You will have to except that things will not be done the way you want or the way they were done in the past, but if it don't mater don't worry about it. If it does matter but can wait just let him do it and it can be changed later. If it matters now offer to help. We get used to things being done a certain way and we want them to be done that way but it really don't matter so it is not worth getting in an argument that no one wins over. Letting thing go or being done in an odd way is hard to get used to but after you do get used to it, it is not all bad not worrying about how things are done or if something doesn't get done. If someone come over and see's something odd you blame him even if you did it.