LO is sundowning/wandering. Do I tell him the truth?

JesseLee

Friends,

Dad is in care, will probably have to move him to higher level facility soon, but can't right now for a couple reasons, one being a Medicaid technicality. (No idea how people pull off fraud! They are up my butt about EVERYTHING, rightfully.) Meanwhile, I'm going to try the black tape/rug in front of his door. His daytime self will ask about it. Do I tell him he was out of his room at night and confused? He has no memory of it. If not, what fiblets are there for the tape/rug? I'm concerned about tripping with the rug, or he'll just move it so leaning towards the tape.

pamu

If he's anything like my mom…she would move the rug! LOL. Before she lived in MC she lived in a building for elderly/disabled. The apartments doors had no security and at the time we weren't concerned with her wandering. We got her a life alert which she had no problem wearing at first. Then she kind of played with it and took it off and put it in a drawer on a regular basis. I would speak to her every evening and remind her to put it on. There were several times she used it as a cell phone to have Life Alert relay messages to me. She didn't understand/remember how she was supposed to use it. Of course one of the nights she did not put it on she fell out of bed and ended up in the ER. She crawled to the living room to use the phone (despite having a handset in her bedroom). She also had emergency pull chains in all the rooms of her apt to use which we reminded her about all the time. She just couldn't handle it…her instinct was to get to the phone in the living room. With that said, your dad may start having similar struggles if he's on his own. My mom moved to AL and ended up wandering several times to the point she ended up in the hospital then to MC (she was already on Medicaid so things moved quickly). She of course denies that she eloped and every now and then will say that everyone lies about her trying to leave AL. Mom has paranoid personality disorder along with dementia so she doesn't believe most of what we tell her. Not sure how your dad's disposition is or the level of care he is getting…nursing home or AL. Were you looking to use the black mat as a deterrent? Are you able to install a camera in his entryway?

JesseLee

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/276798#Comment_276798

He's not at my house, he's in a lower level care home. I don't think he'll argue or say people are lying. His dementia has made him overly agreeable/flat, but still with a good BS detector. I can't think of a plausible fiblet for black tape.

pamu

It’s great he’s agreeable! I’d be curious to know if he was wandering in the room in the dark or with a light on. If there’s no light the black rug/tape may not help. Unless you can put an alarm on the door there will be no other way to alert that he’s wandering out of his room . Does the care home have any safety precautions? My mom is in lockdown but the nursing home/rehab outer doors lock from 8pm-7am.

JesseLee

I decided to be honest. It worked out. He has the black rug now, he leaves a lamp on and sometimes his overhead light. The dr gave him a sleep medication which has stopped the wandering for now. I'm learning that any time you can buy with this disease is a gift. Thanks for the input.