DW wants to go home

Nousti

My DW with MCI frequently tells me she wants to go home. However we have been in our home for 40 years. I don't know how to deflect her from that thought.

jfkoc

Try these…

https://teepasnow.com/blog/how-to-calm-a-person-living-with-dementia-who-is-wanting-to-go-home/

https://www.tiktok.com/%40teepasnow/video/7051627962411633966

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LmD3zpa13_Q

dcare45

This happened alot with my DW in the early stages. She would also ask for relatives that had passed away. I would tell her things like sure we can go in a bit, just let me do this thing first, Oh yeah I always liked being home to, oh they are coming over later today. Telling her we are home never worked. Distractions would work if I kept them up long enough, The problem was at that time she could still keep that thought/conversation in her mind for a while and not let it go.

It was a very frustrating time and I really understand what you're dealing with. The Teepa Snow article above is a good read. I found DWs need was mostly emotional reassurance because she knew something was going on in her mind' didn't understand it and it made her anxious. Now that she has progressed DW only occasionally ask to go home and does not bring up the relatives except in passing.

jgreen

Just let her know you are there with her and will keep her safe. You can go tomorrow. As @dcare45 said, your DW just needs reassurance. You are doing great!

tonyac2

This is the topic that brought me to this wonderful group of folks.
“I want to go home,” Let’s go home,” is so heart breaking to hear. Knowing that they “are home” but then not recognizing it is a heavy load full of sadness.
What I learned here is that home is not a place but more a feeling. Once I could identify the feeling/need, then we were “home.”
One person suggested asking him what he liked most about home, describe it, what do you want to do when you get there. That helped sometimes.
Like most everything else with this hideous disease, “I wanna go home,” didn’t last long. Then is was on to an another new challenge.