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Our anniversary was yesterday. . .

ghphotog
ghphotog Member Posts: 667
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in Caring For a Spouse or Partner

I din't even bother to say "Happy Anniversary!", get her flowers, a card anything. The day just came and went like all others.

If I would've gave her flowers, she would be asking where they came from every few minutes until I finally have to put them out of sight.

She hasn't recognized our marriage in two or three years so saying "Happy Anniversary!" would mean little. If I explained we are married she would disagree anyway. Even if I was able to convince her it was our anniversary she would immediately forget anyhow.

Saves me a lot of endless explaining so I just let it go.

Comments

  • charley0419
    charley0419 Member Posts: 354
    100 Likes 100 Care Reactions 100 Comments 25 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    That’s the part I fear the most. So sad

  • Howaboutnow
    Howaboutnow Member Posts: 133
    100 Care Reactions 100 Comments 25 Insightfuls Reactions 25 Likes
    Member

    @ghphotog I understand, i do the same. I’m sorry.

  • Jo C.
    Jo C. Member Posts: 2,916
    Legacy Membership 2500 Comments 100 Insightfuls Reactions 100 Likes
    Member

    I am so sorry. For myself, I got to the point that I finally did not feel put out about the lack of what would never be again which is so heartbreaking.

    I decided to not feel sad or put out at what was lost, but instead to be grateful that we had the sweet positives in our life even if it was awhile ago; some people never have such experiences, so for having experienced that in my life I am grateful.

  • GiGi1963
    GiGi1963 Member Posts: 101
    100 Comments Second Anniversary 25 Care Reactions 25 Likes
    Member

    We just passed our 60 year anniversary. No recognition from my DH. Our sons took us to dinner but he didn't know why. He asks if we are married constantly and who am I, what's my name. Makes me sad for a life I thought we'd have and what we are living now.

  • Jgirl57
    Jgirl57 Member Posts: 468
    Fourth Anniversary 100 Likes 100 Comments 25 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    Happy Anniversary to you ghphotog💐. It is hard when the significant dates no longer ring a bell.

  • ajanda28
    ajanda28 Member Posts: 3
    First Comment
    Member

    I fear this with my mom. Seems like she still knows who I am but I leave to go back home 🏡 n a week and won’t return for 3 months. I’m afraid when I come back she wo t know who I am

  • LJCHR
    LJCHR Member Posts: 193
    100 Comments 25 Care Reactions 25 Likes First Anniversary
    Member

    So sorry for you - Happy Anniversary. I am not to that point yet but know it is lurking in the shadows.

    JoC, your comment was very inspiring.

  • LJCHR
    LJCHR Member Posts: 193
    100 Comments 25 Care Reactions 25 Likes First Anniversary
    Member
    https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/190589#Comment_190589

    Thank you for your comment. It was inspiring to me.

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
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