Father's Day

N00dles · June 16

With Father's Day tomorrow, I have been a little sad this weekend. My dad, PWD, stills knows I am his daughter (some of the time), but does not say my name. I live out of state and do not get to see him often.

I hate this disease; it robs you of your loved one and it is a continual, gradual loss; sustained grief. I am a grown woman who should be past needing her father's affection.

So much I could say…

Also grieving that my mom recently moved out of the home they lived in for over 50 years; my childhood home. She is in a one-story house that will be much easier for her to keep up with; it was a good decision.

I guess I have trouble with change anyway, so just trying to process, help my mom however we can. It has certainly been a big year, with my dad going into memory care in Jan. somewhat unexpectedly.

psg712 · June 16

Adults are not past needing their parents' affection. That grief is real. My mom lives in an MC ten minutes from me and sees me often, but rarely speaks my name or can identify me as her daughter. I'm used to this reality now, but sometimes the sense of loss hits unexpectedly. Holidays are especially hard for those who have lost loved ones, and the loss of someone to dementia is ongoing.

RoyalBlue · June 16

Grief is grief! There is different kinds of grief! We all have preconceived expectations. When things do not go as expected it throws us into a different realm which shows grief in a different light. When you are in a relationship with someone that has dementia you are on high alert to everything! You really think you know what will happen and it does not happen the way it did before. I once read that grief is love with know place to go. I agree. Because with the changes in a dementia patient you are constantly having to deal with hurt, surprise, dread, loneliness, anger, helplessness, the list goes on. We all need love and affection! When we don't receive it as we once did or we are not able to give it as we once did it hurts!

I hope this helps someone!

Take care of yourself!

Prayers!

N00dles · June 16

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/212968#Comment_212968

Thank you for your comment and prayers.

irene912 · June 17

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/69573/fathers-day

I lost my dad 19 years ago & still thought of him & was sad on father's day. Mom has dementia, so I feel like she's partly gone too. I understand change is hard. My mom moved 2 hours away in an assisted living. She used to live 10 minutes from me. I feel no matter how old we are, we miss our parents. Just try to hang on to the good memories & make new ones for yourself the best you can.

Father's Day

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