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Looking for feedback with early stage DW

My DW is 14 years my senior, 86, and is early stage dimentia (my diagnosis based on criteria from here) Her short term memory is very bad, can't keep day straight even for minutes. Asks same question multiple times a day (ex. son is visiting from out of town. "When is Cam leaving", 5 to 10 times a day). Also we used to discuss topics like politics, history, spirituality, etc, but she can't follow lines of discussion, so I assume this is some cognitivedecline. Has bad case of deja vu. Comments every night that stories on local and national news have been shown before over last few days. When looking for a movie on Netfliks, she has seen most of them, even ones that were just released, insists we saw theem together. She takes care of herself personally (shower, dressing, even dinners). We had Neuropsychological Testing and Assessment about 3 years ago, including brain MRI. No Alz but the test showed signs of early dementia. My DW was angry about the test and refused to pursue anything else.

The memory issues are getting significanly worse over time. She stays up watching TV in bed till 1 or 2 in the morning then sleeps till noon. When she gets up she eats a bowl of yogurt with blueberries (everyday, same) then drinks some coke (to "wake her butt up"). Since it is too hot outside to work in the garden she just plays Freecell and watches Fox and Freinds on TV. Then, after a couple of hours, saying she is not feeling well, goes up to the bedroom and takes a 3 or 4 hour nap.

That's the situation. Not nearly as bad as most otheres here but is my situation. I was looking for advice. Concerned about the excessive sleeping, lack of exercise or activities, need for any more assessment, and any feedback on memory or deja vu. Thanks in advance.

Comments

  • H1235
    H1235 Member Posts: 576
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    The conversation that just keeps circling over the same topics can get very old. Not sure what you can do about that. As far an events coming up, visit from son, doctor appointments, etc, I would just not tell her about any of it in advance. A pleasant surprise when your son arrives is better than days of questions about when he will arrive. I think excessive sleeping and lack of exercise is common with dementia. I know my mom sleeps a lot. But it still might be a good idea to mention it to her doc. If you have not seen this staging tool, you might find it useful.

    https://static1.squarespace.com/static/6372d16ea4e02c7ce64425b7/t/63f7b80d80d8aa3e3aa4a47d/1677178894184/DBAT.pdf

  • Grandot
    Grandot Member Posts: 11
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    you might to read the book Did I Remember to Tell You by Pam Johnson. It gives very specific ways to help your mate with dementia. It was helpful for me!

  • Iris L.
    Iris L. Member Posts: 4,414
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    Grandot, can you post your book recommendation on the Books about Alzheimer's threads on the General Caregivers board? It will be easier for members to find it in the future.

    Iris

  • SDianeL
    SDianeL Member Posts: 967
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    I would talk to her doctor about your concerns. Write a list of her behaviors so you won’t leave anything out. I asked my husbands PCP to refer him to a Neurologist. They referred him to a Neuro Psychologist for testing. Although the Neurologist said he had Dementia, my husband forgot and later asked me and I said you have a problem with your brain. When they added new meds I would say it was a pill for his brain. The word Dementia scared him.

  • Stan2
    Stan2 Member Posts: 84
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  • JiminTexas
    JiminTexas Member Posts: 26
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    We did do the Neuro Psychologist testing a couple of years ago. She said there were early indications of dementia and like your husband, I think it scared her. She is still cognitive enough to realize there is somethng wrong, and with Joe Biden's problems on TV every night, I think it scares her and she doesn't want to even acknowledge a problem or talk about it. When she forgets something she asks "why don't I remember that"? So getting her to a diagnosis is a difficult endevor.

  • Iris L.
    Iris L. Member Posts: 4,414
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    Please learn about anosognosia. She may be unable to talk about what's going on with her.

    Iris

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more