Tough times

mathreader · July 29

So, to add to all that is going on in our lives, our 12 year old dog has been diagnosed with terminal cancer. He has just a couple of days to live. DH, who has already had such a hard time is asking such weird questions. Where are the other adults at dinner (it's only the two of us)? Where are the other dogs (we only have one now)? Last night I heard a whole long dissertation about the difficulty of going to and being in the Turks and Caicos. Did we have weapons? Would they search the boat (we lived and traveled on a boat for 8 years and did do the T&C with no issues - and, no, we didn't carry a gun)? Such weird discussions. Anyone else going through this kind of thing? And he will be crushed when the dog dies - not sure if we will have to euthanize, hoping not, but expecting so. We did have to euthanize a dog in Grenada and it was very traumatic. This has been a horrible week in our lives.

ElizabethAD · July 29

ugh so sorry. I’m brand new to all this but not new to the devastation of losing a beloved pet. 😞

SDianeL · July 29

So sorry about your fur baby. Can you just tell him the dog is at the vet and not tell him he was put to sleep? If his short term memory is gone you may have to repeat the fib daily for awhile. His questions are common. Delusions, confabulations & hallucinations are common as the disease progresses. They have medications that can help. Ask for referral to Geriatric Psychiatrist who can best manage medications for those behaviors.

mathreader · July 29

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/217290#Comment_217290

Your answer is so important. We do have a referral to a geriatric psychiatrist, but the neurologist doesn't seem to think that's the solution. I'm so confused and it seems there are no easy answers here. Maybe we will see the geri-psychologist anyway after hearing your thoughts. As far as the dog, he is my DH's best friend. He would remember that he was not here. He spends his days worrying about the dog - even worrying which room he is in. My daughter and her husband are vets, but, unfortunately , they are away this week. They left us with 2 vets they trust to do the euthanasia, but he wants to wait until they get home. I'm not thinking the dog will make it through the week. This is really hard

ImMaggieMae · July 29

I am so sorry to hear about your dog. It is so hard to lose a beloved pet. They are part of the family. I feel so bad for your DH. It’s hard to know how difficult it will be for him. Perhaps some type of medication could calm him. Sending hugs.

Iris L. · July 29

Do you know about the Rainbow Bridge? It's been very comforting to me.

Iris

Belle · July 29

Sorry to hear about your dog but maybe it won't impact your DH the way you expect. My DH had a dog that was glued to his side 24/7. He took the dog everywhere, the dog slept in his room, etc. That dog also got diagnosed with cancer and it was reaching the time to put her to sleep so she wouldn't suffer and I knew DH either would not agree or would act out when the time came. Luckily (?) DH was hospitalized and I took the opportunity to have the dog put to sleep (the vet agreed it was time). DH was told about the dog needing to be put down while he was away but oddly didn't have much reaction. I told him she would be less upset at the vet if he wasn't there. I thought for sure when he got home he would be missing her and pushing for another dog but that didn't happen. It literally was like out of sight/out of mind. He mentioned her one or two times then never brought it up again. It was not the reaction I was expecting from him so you may be surprised to find your DH isn't as upset as you anticipate.

Denise1847 · July 29

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/70054/tough-times

I am so very sorry. May I suggest you reach out to his doctor for some meds like Sequel, which has helped my DH. Also, we went through the loss of our dog of 14 years. I had a vet come to the house while my son took my DH out. Then I removed all of the reminders of her. He still asked about her but it was so much better for our dog because she was comfortable and not traumatized. I am hoping that the vet has prescribed pain meds for the dog as that can make a real difference in the animal suffering.

Tough times

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