Lessons I've learned about "Memory Care"

thanks for elaborating Cstrope. Agree completely. We are blessed with a reasonable nursing staff overseen by an RN and good food for the most part, with at least two choices at the main meal (one always being a finger food). Activities are mooted for us because she won’t participate. But a big concern for me has been the lack of visual monitoring. They don’t allow cameras because of liability issues, apparently they don’t want a record. So for most folks they want them out in common areas most of the time for group supervision. That has not worked at all for us, both by temperament and by physical limitations (bad back, needs to lie down freq, very uncomfortable if parked in a chair or wheelchair). Hence multiple unwitnessed falls, mostly in her room. Found on the floor multiple times. Bed alarms also not allowed for reasons unclear to me but have to do with state licensing I’m told.

Thanks @CStrope for posting this. It seems like there have been a lot of questions about memory care recently, and your post covers a lot of ground.

As to my experiences with memory care, thankfully most of the things on your list weren't issues for me and Peggy.

But —— the big issue I had with Peggy's memory care that bothered me were the dogs. The new memory care director had two dogs that she brought to memory care every day. She kept them in her office but they were a huge distraction for staff, including her. Once she brought in her dogs, then her assistant brought in her dog, who wasn't kept in an office. And then a third person brought in their dog - also allowed to roam around free. And these were not trained therapy dogs. I was not happy. All I could see were elderly residents not steady on their feet getting tripped up by dogs. One of the dogs was a tiny chihuahua - super cute, but very fast, and a tripping hazard, imo.

note: I prefer cats, but I like dogs too — just not running around in memory care.

My experience has been mostly positive. A few times I was there during meals and most of it was inedible until I mentioned it to the director. The food has since improved. The only other is, just like everyone, certain residents tend to get on everybody's nerves and there can be name calling, tension and threats of violence at times but the staff was always able to diffuse it. I don't know about overnight staff or how patient they are with my wife and they need a lot of patience.

Both MC facilities I used for DH had a common area with two parallel halls going back. There was a hallway across the back and another hall across halfway up. The line of sight was about halfway down. The first had cameras which could be monitored from an app of staff phones. There was no one monitoring. The other had the same set-up but no monitors, so they had no clue what was happening in the cross halls and halfway down. Facilities that had a layout designed for consistent in person monitoring were out of my price range.

Both had two meal options, but residents just had a meal set before them. No inquiry as to what they wanted. Several drink options available, but staff just placed a drink in front of each person.

The were ALF with a MC wing. The activity calendar I was shown was for the ALF side.

From what I observed in the two I used and the others I toured at least twice, it is a business and a scam mostly. I did the best I could with the money I had available from a good LTC policy. He ranted and rage at home. Every visit was raging at me because he was there. Thirty minutes was the longest visit because he would become physical. Not conducive to observing conditions on a frequent basis.