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The last mile

forbarbara
forbarbara Member Posts: 199
100 Care Reactions 100 Likes 100 Comments First Anniversary
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in I Am a Caregiver (General Topics)

I though I was ready for MIL to finish her journey but this is so hard. She’s dying of breast cancer which we chose not to treat. Hospice started morphine a few days ago. I never ever thought I would say this, but thank god for her dementia - she isn’t suffering and has no idea what’s happening to her. Although on some level I believe she’s getting ready to let go, she can go peacefully.
My husband and I left town Thursday, drove all day to visit family, got the call when we arrived Thursday evening that she was in a steep decline and on morphine. We’re due home Sunday night - I was going to turn around and drive home yesterday but the hospice nurse advised me not to change my plans. She said it would take a few days to adjust the morphine and that MIL is not “actively dying” Yet.

Comments

  • Jeanne C.
    Jeanne C. Member Posts: 848
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    strength and peace to you and your MIL.

  • midge333
    midge333 Member Posts: 469
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    I am sorry. I hope she dies peacefully and painlessly.

  • cdgbdr
    cdgbdr Member Posts: 132
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    Wishing for comfort and peace for her and you. Agree to trust hospice.

  • fmb
    fmb Member Posts: 549
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    Prayers for you, your MiL and your family for a safe journey home and comfort, strength and peace in the days ahead.

  • Jgirl57
    Jgirl57 Member Posts: 595
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    (((Hugs))) for a peaceful transition.

  • JeriLynn66
    JeriLynn66 Member Posts: 1,031
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    Prayers for you, your family and your dear Mother-in-Law. Peace be with you.

  • Emily 123
    Emily 123 Member Posts: 872
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    Prayers for all of you. I'm glad that she's comfortable. Perhaps she chose a time when you both weren't nearby to begin this new transition.

  • GothicGremlin
    GothicGremlin Member Posts: 994
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    @forbarbara I'm so sorry. I hope when she lets go it's peaceful and pain-free. And I agree about hospice - trust them.

  • SDianeL
    SDianeL Member Posts: 1,424
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    so sorry. Hugs

  • harshedbuzz
    harshedbuzz Member Posts: 5,027
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    @forbarbara

    I'm thinking of you and yours today.

    HB

  • Carl46
    Carl46 Member Posts: 735
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    I remember watching my father die of cancer, and when the doctors told my mother it was time to let him go. I am so sorry.

  • --Rebecca--
    --Rebecca-- Member Posts: 76
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    May her transition be peaceful. Wishing you all the best, most gentle outcome.

  • TrumpetSwan
    TrumpetSwan Member Posts: 77
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    Forbarbara - Sending you thoughts, prayers and the strength of lions. I am sorry. I am sure you have been a comfort to her and to those around you.

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more

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