In case of an emergency to caregivers

You might need to use a wearable for yourself. Does your wife still know the address? My HWD no longer knows our address or know how to talk to 911 operator so I recently purchased a smart watch for me to wear . It is scary knowing they are not able to assist in an emergency .

@charley0419

I'm going to be blunt.

There is no technological device that 100% replaces a human in the event of an emergency. Full stop.

A pendent you wear could summon EMTs if you are conscious and actually have it on your person. An Apple Watch can detect and fall and send help even if you are unconscious, but it can't help if you have a heart attack in bed.

What you need is a daily well check from a reliable human being. Perhaps a family member or neighbor can check on you daily by text or phone or even a signal like blinds opened by a certain time in the morning. At worst, this will limit your time on the floor/wife alone unsupervised to 24 hours assuming a regular schedule of well checks.

The above is what I do. I call mom daily to check her unless I will be actually seeing her in person. She also wears an Apple Watch (most of the time); I do get an alert if she falls. She had a Medical Guardian, but she never wore it in the 2 years she had it. I also have her registered with Smart911 and have a lockbox on her front door so that first responders can enter the house without breaking down the door.

Mom and I have both accepted the risk that comes with this arrangement. FWIW, a move to a hospitality-model AL would likely only offer a well check every 24 hours. My aunt had a fall in her AL apartment and was on the floor with a broken hip for about 18 hours.

HB

this is the device the VA gave us. If you fall it automatically calls you. If you don’t answer it sends help. You wear it around your neck or on a clip on your belt. She won’t be able to use any device because she doesn’t understand what an emergency is. She wouldn’t know to push a button. You would need to wear the device. You can shower in it. You should still have someone check on you every day. https://www.medequipalert.com/veterans/

@charley0419

Charley,

With great respect, you need to get yourself a fall detection device and you need to have your children check in with you daily and you need to see a Certified Elder Law Attorney for planning purposes.
Your dear wife cannot help you- this isn’t safe for either of you. We care about you.

Respectfully, JeriLynn

I was told that once my husband progresses to the point that he can no longer call for help that I should wear a medical alert device. We have daily check in with neighbors who know what is going on. You can also set up a signal with the front blinds of your home where if they are not opened in the morning and closed at night, the neighbors check on you. I did this with elderly neighbors for years.

This is such an important question and one that more caregivers should be thinking about before they need the answer. The most reliable option for your situation is a medical alert system with a wearable button, something like Life Alert, Medical Guardian, or Bay Alarm Medical, where your wife can press a single button on a pendant or wristband and be connected to a 24-hour monitoring center that dispatches emergency services immediately without her needing to dial anything or remember a number. The key advantage here is that there is literally one button to press and nothing else to remember, which makes it realistic even for someone with significant cognitive decline. Most of these systems also have fall detection built in now, meaning they can automatically call for help even if you are unconscious and unable to call out yourself, which addresses the exact scenario you are describing. Another option worth looking into is Amazon Alexa or Google Home, since you can set either one up so that saying a simple phrase like Alexa call for help triggers an emergency call, though this requires her to remember the phrase which may or may not be realistic depending on her current stage. The wearable button system is almost certainly the most foolproof choice for your situation, and most companies offer month to month plans without long term contracts so you can try one and switch if it does not feel right. This is genuinely one of the most important safety nets a solo caregiver can put in place and you are wise to be thinking about it now.

I hope these references or resources can help:

https://hopebridge.care/emergency-plan-for-caregivers-why-you-need-one/

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emergency_management

https://www.aarp.org/caregiving/basics/preparing-for-emergency/

I have BayAlarm. You wear a device of which you push the button for help and fail to answer their response, the will call emergency services. You can also add on a fall alert button, in case of your falling and not being able to push the emergency button. My DH had already proven that he would not know what to do in case of emergency.

A trustworthy neighbor who checks-in may be useful. For the technology minded, there are apps and other safety ideas listed in this AARP article which refers to the Snug Safety service at the end. A discussion is on AARP's forum that refers to other services, such as I am Fine.