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Just need to talk to my friends ,(206) June 2025

Lorita
Lorita Member Posts: 5,130
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Thanks for reminding me. Just now started to read. Been waiting for Bryon to come to mow but he hasn't. I'm worried that something may have happened to.him because he is always so dependable. Maybe he was mowing somewhere else and hasn't finished.

Thanks, Carl, I'm pretty well today but not up to par. Something has happened to the flag - looks like the.bottom fastener has come loose and just haven't gotten out there to fix it. Have to take down trash so will check on it then. Glad you are doing okay. I will have to go back to 205 to read again.

Hard to believe we're already in June, slipped up on me. Thanks for the reminder.

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  • Carl46
    Carl46 Member Posts: 886
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    Glad you're improving, Lorita.

    I bought DS some new clothes today and am washing them now. A lot of clothes swapping goes on in the RCF and I have no confidence he won't show up in rags for the funeral. We're not dressing up, but I would like him clean and not sporting his signature cigarette burn on his shirt.

    June has started off warm, 85 and sunny, and the forecasters say the month will be unusually hot. I dread July if that is the case, but I'll just stay in the shade from 10 to 2 as I did last summer. My sun-damaged arms look ten years younger since I wore long sleeves the past two summers, so I am wearing them again this year. And a brimmed hat.

    The dryer wants my attention. TTYL

  • Lorita
    Lorita Member Posts: 5,130
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    I'm about ready for bed. Been a long day. I had my.phone on the charger and missed a call from Bryon. He was having problems with his mower and called to apologize. To me, he sounded really fown. He has a big mower,- brand is Bad Boy. I had never heard of that brand until I saw his.

    Ron, I think you have good advice to take what you can and later decide what to keep.I have never had to move many things but I know it must be quite an ordeal. Let your son do the heavy work.

    Good to hear from Jo, wasn't it - but sad to hear about her condition. HB, I didn't understand what you were telling her daughter, maybe she did. I have tried a couple of times to get in touch with Joan again but no answer. I imagine she's in the hospital for her surgery. I will keep trying.

    I'm tired from doing nothing except taking down the trash. I need to spray more Round Up tomorrow on poison ivy, poke weeds and berry vines- if it isn't going to rain.

    Good night, everyone. Sleep tight.

  • Mint
    Mint Member Posts: 3,077
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    Good Morning

  • jfkoc
    jfkoc Member Posts: 4,348
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    up…

  • ronald71111
    ronald71111 Member Posts: 1,338
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    Good morning!

    Worn out, even though my boys did all the heavy lifting. I'm just not use to not being more physically active, but everytime I start my youngest says "go sit down pops, we have this".

    Ron

  • Lorita
    Lorita Member Posts: 5,130
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    Morning ,that's the way it should be, Ron. Let them do the heavy stuff and you supervise.

  • eaglemom
    eaglemom Member Posts: 786
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    Good morning all.

    Ron that's the way its suppose to be. They want to make it as easy on you physically as possible, let them.

    Carl it sounds like things are in place for you. I'm glad others are helping you out. Let them, it makes them feel better. Remember to breath. We are here for you.

    It's good to get an update on Jo. She's been so vital to this message board, has given such wonderful information and her vast knowledge is beyond all. I miss her.

    It seems like our board has been quiet. I guess people are busy. Let's be safe everyone.

  • Lorita
    Lorita Member Posts: 5,130
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    II was so good to get news from Jo. We do miss her.

    Carl, when I lost Charles ten years and five months ago, I was alone. No blood relatives around. This thread was so much help to me. The day of the funeral someone on this thread told me I was not alone, that all of the friends would be beside me. That's how it will be for you. We will be there. You can depend on that.

    Charles' relatives came from Texas the day of the funeral and my friends from work and neighbors were there. Everyone on the thread was there and I could feel their presence. It was a military' funeral with the shots fired and the casket draped in the American flag which was presented to me. I have it in one of those triangular cases with his medals in a case. This is in one corner of our sunroom.

    I hope you are doing all right and can rest.

  • Carl46
    Carl46 Member Posts: 886
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    edited June 2

    Thank you, Lorita. You and our friends have been a big help to me for quite a while.

    I didn't sleep well last night so I took a nap for the past hour, and the couple across the street just brought a large, hot container of roast, potatoes and carrots, and a chocolate cake. Her sister just lost her husband to cancer and the funeral is at the same time is my wife's, but they offered to help me when I need it. I don't have a lot of family left, but I have great friends and neighbors.

  • ladyzetta
    ladyzetta Member Posts: 1,183
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    edited June 2

    Carl. Your Front Porch Friends, are family, we will be with you, please remember that 🙏 take care of yourself and get lots of rest. Hugs Zetta ☺️

  • Iris L.
    Iris L. Member Posts: 4,701
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    Ron, let the boys do the moving.

    Carl, we'll be here for you.

    Lorita, I am just now beginning to feel rested enough from jetlag. I have been sleeping 9-10 hours. We don't bounce back the way we used to. Bryon might have worn himself out fiddling with his mower. I get worn out myself when things don't work.

    Iris

  • harshedbuzz
    harshedbuzz Member Posts: 5,190
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    Good afternoon from the public library.

    In a classic no good deed goes unpunished, I finally got a hole of the landscape guys who take care of most folks on my cul de sac. He was able to slot me in yesterday after finishing up at the neighbor's house. The price doubled since last time but I had him pull 7 mostly dead azaleas and trim the shrubs, magnolia and dwarf maple. He'll give me a price for clearing the fence line later.

    Midway through the job the internet and cable TV died. They cut a cable. Grrr. Tech can't come until 7:30 Wednesday morning. I noticed this afternoon that they took out an Itoh peony I'd planted bareroot 2 years ago. Ugh.

    DS and DH went to a matinee to see the new Tom Cruise movie. I need to circle back and collect them in a couple hours after I run a few errands. I needed some courtesy checks from the bank— I still need them for certain people. They gave me them, but a reorder would be $30 for 60 checks. That's insane. I need to swing by mom's while I'm in her neighborhood.

    Be well.
    HB

  • ladyzetta
    ladyzetta Member Posts: 1,183
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    If you have been watching the Bald Eagles, Sunny left the nest at 10:46, Gizmo, is saying what the heck. She is now out of sight, and Gizmo is waiting for her to return. I'm also waiting. The camera operators are trying to find her. 😢👀👀

  • GothicGremlin
    GothicGremlin Member Posts: 1,069
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    Ron - I'm glad your sons have everything under control for you. And it's clear they really want to help.

    Carl - I'm happy that you've got a lot of support, your son, and your friends and neighbors.

    I'm so glad about your last interactions/memory with your wife. So peaceful and loving. And you are so right about the fear and disorientation in her own house. That was a hard one for me as well when my sister reached that stage.

    HB - I think downtown Charleston is charming, I love the market. I like to pick up southern spice mixes there. I really like Folly Beach too, probably because I spent so much time in Santa Cruz, CA. I like a good beach. 😄 Myrtle Beach is nice too

    Drat about the extra month with the splint. That's no fun

    Laughing though about the rabbits.

    Lorita - I didn't realize that's how it was for you after your husband passed away.

    My dad also had a military funeral (he was in the Navy in WWII - lied about his age to get in). There were shots fired, and the folded flag was given to my brother. Of course he didn't want it, so I have it, still neatly folded. I've also got it next to my dad's medals.

    Zetta - so glad you guys are going to stick with yoga. It's inspiring.

    eaglemom - Charleston is very pretty. I like strolling around downtown even if I have no destination in mind.

    JeriLynn - so many great pics! Your hydrangeas are amazing. And that's a great photo of you and your DH. I hope you're having a wonderful trip.

    @Ms McGillicuddy - thank you for the update on your mom. I didn't interact with her a lot, but I read every post she wrote. She has so much wisdom, and I reaped the benefits of that wisdom as I applied what I learned from her in my care of my sister.

    As for me, we're still in Charleston, we'll head back to the Cold Waste on Wednesday. My s.o. is at the dentist right now with his mom. She's getting a crown put on her tooth so he's there as support and to drive. I'm glad we've been able to help her out - running errands, general cleaning, doing the laundry, just stuff.

    I hope everyone is having a great day.

  • jfkoc
    jfkoc Member Posts: 4,348
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    first flight;

    https://abc7.com/post/big-bear-eagles-jackie-shadows-eaglets-takes-first-flight-leaves-nest/16634842/

  • jfkoc
    jfkoc Member Posts: 4,348
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    Sooo…Long story short nI have decided to not buy kitchen scale because if I make sourdough bread (cuts down gut inflamation which I have no reason to believe is a problem for me) I will eat the br4ead with Irish butter.

    Carl…If you have a chance please let us know what time the service is tomorrow.

  • eaglemom
    eaglemom Member Posts: 786
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    I believe Carl said the funeral is tomorrow morning at the churchyard. I'm assuming the churchyard is a cemetery by the church? I don't know.

  • GothicGremlin
    GothicGremlin Member Posts: 1,069
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    I just saw this article about the MIND diet. My diet is close to that already, but I'll have to add different berries (like blackberries, raspberries & boysenberries) because I'm allergic to blueberries and I just can't face a strawberry.

    Then I saw an interesting article about younger generations being less likely to develop dementia. The authors list the reasons, and many of those are what we would call 'best practices.' But I thought I've seen (elsewhere) that other, newer risk factors are cropping up, like air pollution. So, I don't know what to think, but I thought it was interesting, so I thought I'd post it.

    Carl - thinking of you.

    eaglemom - I think graveyards are located near a church (maybe affiliated with that church), and I think "graveyard" and "churchyard" can be used interchangeably. A cemetery is located elsewhere, and not affiliated with a church.

  • Carl46
    Carl46 Member Posts: 886
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    The funeral will be a brief graveside service at 10 AM CDT Tuesday.

    The burial will be at Patterson Cemetery. I sometimes call it a churchyard because it used to be a church, that was still standing when I was a boy. A man named Patterson had a store across the road about the time of the Civil War, and neighboring farmers (including my great-great grandparents) bought a plot of land and built a church. The church was a simple frame structure with wooden pews and a gravel floor made of smooth gravel hauled in wagons from the nearby river. The store and church are long gone, and nothing is left of the embryonic little community of Patterson but a cemetery and a stone marker erected by the County historical society in the 1920s. Six generations of my family are buried there, including my older son, and my wife will be buried next to him. We have placed headstones to reserve places for me and for my disabled son.

    My son is staying with me tonight so we can go together to the cemetery. Then I'll take him back to the RCF to his girlfriend and other friends and go home to an empty house. That sounds like I'm feeling sorry for myself, and I am feeling sorry for myself, but my wife's sister said I have every right to feel sorry for myself.

  • Carl46
    Carl46 Member Posts: 886
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    The funeral will be 5-10 minutes, hopefully between rains, attended by a half dozen people. The only people who came to visitation were family, some of our neighbors, three women with whom I used to work, and my housekeepers. The latter are a married couple who have worked for me for 25 years and who consider us friends, partly because I have helped them financially on occasion. None of Kathy's old friends kept up with her during her illness, after she wasn't fun anymore. That is normal, from what I read. We never were people who had a wide circle of friends.

    And then it will be over. I can put 58 years of marriage behind me and go on with my life.

  • Carl46
    Carl46 Member Posts: 886
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    I just reread my posts, and they sound really sad. They are being written 13 hours before my wife's funeral, so they are sad. I'll be cheerful again, I promise. Not today, and probably not tomorrow, but sometime.

    Thank all of you for thinking of me. It helps.

  • Lorita
    Lorita Member Posts: 5,130
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    Carl, you all must have gotten married young. You all had a wonderful, long marriage together with loads of memories. Those will be so helpful to.you

    You mentioned rain-- we had graveside services for daddy and it was raining softly. Someone said to me that it was a shame it had to be raining. I told them it was very appropriate for daddy - he was a farmer and always looked forward to rain. When he was in the NH and we would go see him, his first question was ," did we get some rain?". I would not have had it any other way, for him, and me. So, maybe the rain will be good for you, too. We will be there at 10 in the morning, right beside you.

    You may not rest well tonight but maybe realizing that your wife is well now and free of the shackles of alzheimers will help. She is, again, the beautiful girl you married fifty eight years ago. Try to sleep my friend.

  • Carl46
    Carl46 Member Posts: 886
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    We were 20 years old. We had jobs, about $100, some garage sale and borrowed furniture, and not much else. We rented a duplex apartment for $50 a month, and it was enough.

    It's almost 10 PM and I have to get up in the morning, so I'm off to bed. Sleep well, Lorita and all.

  • Mint
    Mint Member Posts: 3,077
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    good morning

    Ron sounds like you’ve been blessed with a good family. That is a lot to be thankful for. I loved the picture. Thank you for sharing it.

    Carl: Ecclesiastes 3:4 a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; One day you will think of her and smile. That would make her smile.

    Peace to all

  • Carl46
    Carl46 Member Posts: 886
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    Good morning, Ron. That's a great picture, I can see why you cherish it.

  • Iris L.
    Iris L. Member Posts: 4,701
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    Ron: You have a strong family.

    Iris

  • Caro_Lynne
    Caro_Lynne Member Posts: 396
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    Ron, that picture needs no words - it's beautiful xo

    Carl we're with you xo

    Lorita, hope you are getting back to normal xo

  • BethL
    BethL Member Posts: 1,017
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    Carl, so sad for you today. You have been through a lot. Loss is hard. Someday, things will begin to look a little brighter. Take a lot of time for yourself, doing whatever it is you feel like doing, whether that be going to the diner for lunch, spending time with neighbors, going to the gym, reading a good book or listening to music you enjoy. Just be kind to yourself and try to eat well and sleep well. Praying for you, my friend.

    Ron, that photo is special! Family! ❤️

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more