Home Renovations with LO

Our home was built in the 1950's so there is always a next project we are wanting to get done. When DW was in the MCI phase, having the workers in the house was well tolerated and I only had to act as occasional guardrails for her. Now that we are in early stage 6, I dread having any work done in the house as DW agitation is off the charts while the workers are here making noise.

I think everyone's experience will be different. However if you need the work done, and you think DH can handle it, I would do it now. The future is uncertain with how he may react. I am glad we got some work done a few years ago as it would be so much harder to do those same projects today.

Maybe start with a higher priority, self contained project and see how it goes. However if you think you can get through it, now is the time. My DW has grown increasingly sensitive to noise and related disruptions in the home. I am not sure if that is typical.

My DH seems to do the same as others have stated. When I have any type of contractor or landscaper at the house, my DH always stays in another room and just stays away from the people and conversations. It has been that way for at for a few years now, as four years ago I put our home up for sale, and moved us across country to be closer to our daughter and family and during the whole process, my DH stayed away from everyone we dealt with and really didn’t even ask questions on what was going on. My DH has never really acknowledged that he has Alzheimer’s but his actions, such as these, let me know on some level he knows.

If DH asks the same questions again and again, you might do what I did for DW: Create an FAQ on the topic. They are frequently asked questions, after all. Over time I wrote nearly 20 on various topics and kept them in a notebook. I suppose this might be taken as insulting by your LO, because it might be interpreted as your thinking the LO is stupid. It will, however, reduce your frustration level.

We had a major landscaping project and then a bathroom remodel in the last 18 months. My Dh wanted to talk to all the workers. He can carry off a superficial social conversation, but otherwise doesn’t understand information or remember any messages that he was given. I’d have to intercept him. I remember being on the phone with the contractor while my Dh made a beeline to the garage to talk to the septic repairman, and I went running out to see the man driving away. My Dh couldn’t tell me what happened. That part was the most stressful to me because I felt like I was sort of usurping him, but I’m glad we did the projects. I agree that it’s a good time to consider including adaptations.

Same experience(s) here - intolerant to the noise and commotion, wants to hide out away from the people in the house and wants me there with her so I can listen to her complain. And, I'm pretty much able to do whatever I want/need if I pitch it right - "those retaining walls are an eyesore, we're about 10 years past their expected lifespan and they really need to be replaced." We also really need to paint the interior of the house and replace the hardwood floors in two bedrooms, but I'm not sure I have the fortitude to listen to her complain for the number of days it will take to complete those projects. The retaining walls are Need to Do, but the paint and floors are Nice to Do, so they will probably wait.