I feel likeI have been mourning for the last two years

I'm so sorry you are having to deal with this. @SDianeL also experienced a similar situation, having to place her husband upon learning of her cancer diagnosis and need for treatment. Hopefully she will be along to comment and lend support. Hugs to you as you navigate this difficult time.

so sorry about your husband and your cancer diagnosis. I’ve been where you are. I had no choice but to place my husband in memory care after my cancer diagnosis in late 2023. It was heartbreaking. I understand exactly how you feel. The grief for what we lost and grief for what would have been. The facility my husband was in had a social worker, support group and Chaplin and offered their counseling. I moved in with my daughter so I didn’t use them but I recommend it if you need someone to talk to. My Oncologist also offered to refer me to a counselor. Thankfully, my husband didn’t remember how long it had been between my visits and was always glad to see me. The nurses would call me and hand the phone to him so we could talk daily. Also thankfully he never knew I had cancer. He passed away last August. I miss him so much but am thankful he’s no longer suffering. If you would like to communicate with me directly, feel free to send me a private message. Sending prayers and hugs for your strength during the days ahead. Praying that your cancer treatment is successful. My last scan was clear. 🙏💜🙏💜🙏