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Short Term Memory

Momx3
Momx3 Member Posts: 33
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Just a question…my DH short term memory is almost completely gone. He can do something or ask a question and within one minute have no memory of anything. Here's the question…He can still drive into town and run to the store with no issue. How can his memory be so bad but yet he can navigate into town driving in the car with no problem. Anyone else experience this with their person.

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  • Momx3
    Momx3 Member Posts: 33
    Second Anniversary 10 Comments 5 Likes 5 Care Reactions
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    Thank you for the wake up call!! You are absolutely right!

  • Momx3
    Momx3 Member Posts: 33
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    Thank you for your post!! He will not drive any more.

  • lenbury
    lenbury Member Posts: 44
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    I would get a doctor to help with explaining this to your husband.

  • Lgb35
    Lgb35 Member Posts: 174
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    I have been thinking about you! I know your DW is in her final stages. My DH was confirmed to have the same diagnosis of semantic PPA.


    My DH still drives and ignores all notifications to stop driving whether from me or the doctor. We recently took a long drive out of state. He can drive down the road just fine but his navigation is not good and he drives too fast and tailgates people.

    on the advice of my attorney I know about his diagnosis and have power of attorney over him so it could put me in a vulnerable situation because if anything should happen, I should have known and stopped his driving

    I am reporting him to the DMV

  • jgreen
    jgreen Member Posts: 52
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    Take away the car keys and hid them. That’s what we had to do for DH. Reporting him or ‘telling’ him he cannot drive will not stop him.

    One in our group offered telling DH that ‘you feel like driving today’ and get on the driver’s seat automatically.

    Know that you are still going to meet resistance and possibly some anger, but you are keeping him (and others) safe.

  • harshedbuzz
    harshedbuzz Member Posts: 5,917
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    With all due respect, please do not rely on the DMV to safeguard yourself.

    You, as POA, acknowledge your Legal obligation to prevent him from driving. He has a diagnosis of dementia and is driving against medical advice which means it is likely his insurance policy is voided. Not only do you risk everything you own in the event of an accident, but you also risk prosecution and jail time.

    My dad was very driven to drive. It was his entire personality. He never really got over not driving although the vigor with which he argued did abate over time. The last conversation I ever had with him, hours before he died, was about me promising to bring his long-gone Ford to the MCF in case he needed to go somewhere.

    What helped mom and me was not just securing the car keys but also moving the car which acted as a visual trigger. Out-of-sight is out-of-mind for many with dementia. He still carried on about driving but seemed to be less agitated if he didn't see the car. Blaming it on the doctor also helped redirect his anger a bit.

    Medication may be needed. Your post has the tone of a woman who is walking-on-eggshells. If this is the case, getting him to a geri psych for medication to dial that back would be useful for you both. In an emergency, a call to 911 and transport to the ED for a geri psych stay may be the fastest way to get help.

    A few folks here have had success with trading in an older car on a newer model with a keyless ignition as a way to safeguard against driving.

    HB

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
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