Update: Mood swings and anger issues
I want to think everyone who responded to my last post. That night I got a call from hospice to discuss my wife’s condition. I mentioned her anger and was told that the memory care staff had Lorazepam on hand that they could give her with my permission. I said that was alright with me and was told it would be passed on. On two days since then I’ve been told that it had been given to her that morning. I didn’t ask the results, but by the time I got there they must have worn off. I don’t know what the next step is from here so I’ll just wait and see.
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they may have to adjust the dose or try other meds. Sometimes it takes awhile. Glad they are helping her. Let them know her behavior because they don’t see her all the time. Keep talking to hospice.
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My sister is 71yrs not officially dx yet. Unable answer certain questions...like the presidents name. Was found unconscious in her car a few months. She is denial of this. She's paranoid very angry . Very angry at me because I have her car keys. Was told not to drive but does not believe. Obsessed with money and her inability to drive. Lives alone and does fine in her apartment. Wants to take in her apartment (in her will) so im trying..she doesn't believe me .I have a wonderful woman with her during the dsy. She likes her but says she doesn't need a babysitter. Im a nurse work full time still. Yesterday I received 164 texts from her. All very angry, name calling etc. Refuses to take any extra meds for her behavior because she has no behavior, it's all my fault. Im really trying not to take it personal but it's difficult..5
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Welcome. So sorry you are in a difficult position, yet glad you found us. I see this is your first post. Just know when you respond to someone, answers to you might get buried. Your post would might get you more answers/support of you start a new thread. Just a suggestion.
It looks like you are the primary caregiver. I encourage you to do as much research as possible on the disease (even if you do not have an official diagnosis). There is a nice book titled The 36-Hour Day that could prove helpful to you.
There is a term - Anosognosia - which means your sister is unable to recognize her diagnosis and impaired cognitive abilities. As someone else explained - ‘her reasoner is broken’. So nothing you say or try to explain will help her understand. I imagine a lot of her anger, paranoia, anxiety are all part of being scared. You are going to be her ‘rock’ and advocate in all of this.
Last piece of advice - consult an Elder Care Attorney as soon as possible. You will want to get powers of attorney for health and financial so you can make decisions for your sister.
I hope others will see your post/reply here in this thread and chime in with other advice.
Do check in with this special group. We all care about each other, and now you. Sending you a big hug!
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I hope things keep working for you @Arrowhead
Hugs💔
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welcome. Sorry about your sister. The behaviors you listed are very common with dementia. 2 things I learned here: Never argue with someone with dementia and 2) You can’t reason with someone whose reasoner is broken. I said that as my mantra several times a day. In addition to the book “The 36 Hour Day” search online for dementia caregiving videos by Teepa Snow or Tam Cummings. Learn all you can so you can help her. Come here often and create a new post using the plus sign at the bottom of the page. 💜
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Anosognosia can be one of the most challenging behaviors experienced in the AD path. My dear wife had it for a couple years and it was terrible. Participating here was such a help in understanding the condition and finding ways to cope, you cannot change it. Maybe that was my biggest learning, I had to cope, I had to learn to live with it, I had to believe every minute that she could not do anything about what was happening. When I was able to turn my reactions, my frustration, my anger toward the disease, not my wife, I found some peace as we struggled through it. Like it was mentioned above, I came to believe my dear wife was scared of the changes occurring to her that she could not control nor understand fully. It was with that realization that I actually began to see the fear in her face. That was heart crushing. This site should become your best resource for help, ideas, support, and a safe place to just let it out.
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Welcome.
I thought this might help.2
Commonly Used Abbreviations
DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
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