Moved exes in together

Welcome. This sounds like a good idea, but there are some things that may cause problems. Learning new things/surroundings can be difficult for a person with dementia. This new environment might cause some added confusion. You didn’t say what stage they were in, but most are diagnosed about stage 4. By stage 5 they should have 24/7 care. My point is this might be a lot of work to set up to only have it work for a short time. Even if they are able to to care for themselves in a basic way, many with dementia have anosognosia. This means they are not able to recognize their symptoms or limitations. They may decide to go for a walk, stand on a chair to change a light bulb, mow the lawn, or bake bread even though these thing may not be safe for them. In addition many also lack good judgment. This is one of the main reasons mom couldn’t live alone, because I just couldn’t trust her to be safe. I have heard that some people disconnect the stove, but that’s only one of many ways there could be problems. We used cameras around the house for a while. I think the most important things is will they know what to do if there is a fire? Another concern is the two of them being together. People with dementia often lack empathy and teaching Alan the best way to interact with Sue is probably not going to work. The number one rule with dementia is never try to reason with them. Their reasoner is broken. This is hard for anyone, let alone someone else with dementia. My uncle (86) doesn’t have dementia, but he really doesn’t understand my moms deficits. Trying to get them to be patient and understanding with each other might be a loosing battle. Everyone with dementia is different, so a lot will just depend on how they progress. My mil became laid back and easy going (oblivious to things), my mom has become demanding, angry and opinionated. Do you have the legal side of things in order? Each of them should have an appointed DPOA. It’s best if the DPOA is near by and contributing to care needs. A DPOA out of state and not involved in care could cause problems. I have attached some resources. The more you can learn about dementia the better. Notice on the staging tool it gives a rough age equivalence for each stage. I would use that to help guide you on their safety. I found there were so many things that I just assumed mom could do. I took her to the dentist every 6 months and she got a new tooth brush. I assumed she was tossing the old one and replacing it each time(not true). Mom did her own laundry in the beginning , but I noticed she ran the washer twice without even putting clothes in. Food in the refrigerator needs to be checked regularly.