I hate myself for getting rid of Dad's phone
I am devastated. I had to disconnect my dad's phone tonight. He just called 911 too many times. I hate this. I feel like I am cutting him off.
Comments
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You are keeping him safe and housed. You can’t have him kicked out of his facility or being arrested for false 911 calls. Thats your first priority. Keeping him happy is no longer an option because 1)it conflicts with keeping him no safe and housed and 2) you can’t make him happy no matter what you do.
It’s hard being the caretaker of someone who can’t understand logic or social norms.
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It hurts you, possibly more than it hurts him, to make changes like this. But it is necessary for the reasons Qbc mentioned above. Grieve the losses, but stay the course. You are not "cutting him off" - you are still his loving child and his advocate.
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you didn’t do this to him, you did it for him. Dementia did it to him. Don’t feel guilty. He will soon forget the phone altogether. The facility may have a phone so he can still call you. Hugs. 💜
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I’m so sorry! You’re still there for him even if he can’t call you. You’re likely also mourning the progression of the disease which is perfectly normal. All of our LO’s lost their phones eventually, and they’re all ok. I know it doesn’t make it any easier!
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Just an update. Saw my dad today after I cancelled his phone. He mentioned once where is his phone. I didn't say any thing he didn't seem too concerned. So it was a nice comfortable visit despite his lack of phone.
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That is good to hear!
When we moved mom to MC, we did not bring her phone. In 5 months of being there, she only mentioned it once early on.
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I’m glad. I hope it continues to go well. I find some of the things I stress my self out over (expecting she will not handle well) end up going much smoother than I would have imagined.
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Commonly Used Abbreviations
DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
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