I'm new here. My 66 year old wife has Alzheimer's. It's rough!

Jeff H · January 8

My wife was recently diagnosed with Alzheimer's but it seems fairly advanced. She was prescribed Rexulti to curb her agitation and sundowning that seems to help but she still falls back into "Who are you. I'm not married to you. Why are you here." What a awful disease this is! It's really tough being a caregiver for my wife of 25 years! It's exhausting. Just venting. Thank you.

Jeff H · January 8

trottingalong · January 8

I’m sorry you are going through this. It is one hell of a horrible disease. Nothing is easy.

jgreen · January 8

Hi @Jeff2026.1

Welcome. So sorry you have to be here but glad you found us. This is a wonderful group of caring individuals who are in very similar circumstances to yours. I hope you will check in with us frequently. You can vent here whenever you need.

I recommend you read up on this awful disease. A lot of it is scary and depressing, but I found that if I take off my ‘wife hat’ and put on my ‘nurse or caregiver hat’ I can be a bit more objective. There is a good book titled ‘The 36-Hour Day’ that will have answers and tips for you. Be sure to get the 8th edition (most current). There are also some good YouTube videos by Dr. Natalie Edmunds (Dementia Careblazers), Dr. Tam Cummings, and Teepa Snow. They each review the different behaviors and offer advice for caregivers.

If you haven’t already, speak to an Elder Care Attorney to get your financial and health care affairs in order. I recommend you go by yourself the first time. This person can also talk with you about placement or in-home care options, and also how to protect your assets if you find you need to get outside help with your DW.

I am attaching a document that can help you determine what stage your DW is in. I am not looking forward to what the future will bring to me and my DH, but at least I will be somewhat prepared and not surprised.

Dementia Behavioral Assessment.pdf

I know others will chime in to offer more tips and advice.

You can do this! Sending you hugs and prayers 💝

Sunfish47 · January 8

Yes this is tough and heart breaking and exhausting. So sorry youre having to go thru this.

rplourde50 · January 8

I too have a 66 yo DW with Alzheimer's (middle stages). It's a lot of work. Plan for as many contingencies now, when you have time, to be prepared for later stages. Every day is different.

Jeff H · January 14

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/263014#Comment_263014

Thank you! Yes, I have already talked with an elder care attorney. They updated our Will and POA's. My wife actually went through the signing without any issues. It was early though, 11am. I did meet with them before that and they did discuss methods for securing our assets so they are not drained if she has to be admitted to a 24/7 care facility down the road. I was relieved at that although some of our retirement funds are locked in for another 3 to 4 years.

I let my brother and sister know. I also texted my brother-in-law in California. He replied with he would like to chat with me because he thinks is wife has it also.

ehanzel · January 17

I am new here My 63 year old wife has Alzheimer's. It's a horrible disease. She was diagnosed in 2018, and has just continued to decline. She isnt able to communicate, makes loud noises and newer stops once she gets up. I am here to see if there is something that I can glean from your discussions that might help me get through the day. Medical and financial POAs are critical especially when you end up at the hospital for one thing or another.

jgreen · January 18

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/263733#Comment_263733

Welcome, @ehanzel I am so sorry you are in the same boat as the rest of us.

There is much you can glean from this site, and from others who have experienced what you are going thru now. Continue to come back and let us know how you are doing.

Please know that you replied to a post and you could miss out on some good tips and advice. I recommend you post a new topic and from there you will have many more views and responses. On my device there is an orange colored ‘New Discussion’ button on the top right screen. I learned that others have a ‘plus sign’ at the bottom of the screen where you can post.

I hope to see you soon!

I'm new here. My 66 year old wife has Alzheimer's. It's rough!

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