Picture book for dementia patients to help them understand their condition?

This is tough, welcome to the club no one wants to be a member of. I'm not aware of a book, but maybe someone else will chime in.

Since my mom was 94 at time of diagnosis, probably early Stage 4 at the time, we never mentioned anything to do with Alzheimers or dementia, but blamed it on old age. She could understand that she was old, and that old people sometimes have problems with their memory. Telling her she had a disease would have been very upsetting for her. Had she been diagnosed earlier in the disease progression, it might've made sense to tell her. It really depends on the person and the stage of dementia.

Whenever she would bring up the subject of her bad memory or apologize for it, we'd play it cool and reassure her saying things like "That's OK, I forget things sometimes too. Two brains are better than one. We'll figure it out together."

With dementia, people will lose the ability to reason and understand. They might nod along with you and appear to understand, but they're not really grasping what it means. It will just give them one more thing to worry about and fixate on.

The key thing is to keep a calm upbeat demeanor that makes them feel loved and supported (even though you're actually devastated and terrified inside). While a person with dementia loses many of their brain functions, they STILL retain the ability to detect your facial expressions, mood, and tone of voice.

The pcp gave my mom that quick little in office test and she did just fine. I insisted on a referral to a neurologist. It took us months to get in. The neurologist gave her a 2 hour cognitive evaluation. After the the exam, doctor said she had dementia and was no longer safe to drive and should not be living alone anymore. Unfortunately that was it. She has vascular dementia (which will not show up in a blood test) so unfortunately there was nothing else they could do. Repeated questions are so frustrating. I don’t think there is anything that can be done.

welcome. Sorry about your Dad’s diagnosis. I would stop talking to your Dad about the disease. It only causes him anxiety. When my DH was diagnosed I avoided saying anything about his disease. I would say we’re just getting older. When the doctor prescribed Memantine he asked what it was for. I simply said to help your brain. He accepted that. Although your Dad is still younger the “we’re getting older” should work for him because his short term memory and reasoning ability is going. He’s just looking for reassurance. To be too honest with someone with dementia is cruel. So fib if you must. Read the book “The 36 Hour Day” and search online for dementia caregiving videos by Tam Cummings or Teepa Snow. They are very helpful. 2 things I learned here early on: 1) never argue with someone with dementia and 2) You can’t reason with someone whose reasoner is broken. 💜

I did the same with my Mom and I often wondered if I should have told her directly and explain it…but I didnt see what good could come out of such conversation….These days and only when she asks…I tell her that as we get old everything starts to decline including our brains…and she seems to grasp that without significant stress.