OVERLOADED WITH INFORMATION / NEWLY DIAGNOSED
Comments
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Hello, lazymoming05 and welcome to the forum. I remember right after DH was diagnosed and both he and I were trying to find out as much as we could and how frightened and overwhelmed I felt. Yes, sometimes seeing all that negative information was too much at times and I had to back off. It was different when I found this forum. Everyone here understood and even though they struggled, they also offered sound and gentle advice and encouragement. Dealing with Alzehimer's is not easy but you will get by a day at a time. Come here often and ask all the questions you need to ask. There is always someone here who has experienced the same thing or similar. Be gentle with yourself. Sending hugs.
Brenda
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I am sorry for your husband’s diagnosis. Everyone here understands how overwhelmed you feel right now. From experience, the best thing you can do right now is get your financials in order by making an appointment with an Elder Law attorney. The attorney will prepare the necessary legal documents. Get Hippa forms signed with all doctors so that you can have access to doctors and medical records. You want to do this immediately while he can still sign legal documents. You will have to take over all financials. Get account numbers, log ins and passwords for all accounts, computers, phones. Put bills on automatic payment. Buy TILE gps trackers and put them on keys, phones, wallets, purse. It tracks the items and person through the Life360 app. Driving: Alzheimer’s impacts driving. He should not be driving. Call your insurance company and ask if they will cover an accident. If he gets into an accident, you could get sued for everything you own. There are facilities that will give him a three hour driving test to assess if he is safe to drive. Purchase the book The 36 Hour Day. It will help you prepare for what is coming. Come up with a plan b if you can no longer care for him. That would involve looking into an agency for in home care and out of placement memory care facility that will put him on a waitlist. Call your local Council for Aging and ask what services are available including adult daycare. If you are near a Mayo Clinic, get a doctor referral for The Habit Program. It is an excellent program for patients and their caregivers. Once you have gotten these affairs in order, live each day to its fullest and do what is on your bucket list while he still can. Do whatever you can to slow the progression. Come back here for help and support.
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You definitely want to get all your legal, financial, medical and durable POA and estate stuff done while he can sign things. Then start making a Plan B in case you end up with health issues and need a plan for his care.
If everyone’s stories of their loved one’s behavior or quality of life is what is overwhelming you … remember this: Every person with dementia is an individual. Yes, there are 7 stages to this- but your loved one may never get to stage 7. Even if they do, they may not exhibit every behavior of every stage.
I briefly joined some Facebook dementia support groups - until I found myself overwhelmed with the amount of posts and comments and the drama. I’ve found this forum much more helpful.
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Welcome and so sorry you are here with our group. Just a thought as in the beginning I too was overwhelmed with information, emotions, and the real sense that we would never be the same. Early onset can really take the rug out from you. It is okay to take some time just get your feet under you and return back to doctor's/specialists with clarifying questions or for a better understanding. I thought I needed to understand it all from the start but have found returning later to better understand the medical information has been both a relief and I am now better prepared to take it in.
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I agree with the above post make sure your legal paper work is in order then learn what you can but know no two cases are the same so don't get to stressed or bogged down in what could be. develop a plan b and learn as you go and how it relates to your situation. If you are worried about every possible situation you will miss the life you have left together. With your legal work done and a plan b option then live your life and come back with thoughts input and questions. this group will share their thought and experiences, and you will be able to gain from that and also help other with your thoughts and experiences. It is a stressful time but don't let it stop you from building memories for as long as you can.
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Commonly Used Abbreviations
DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
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