Mom Diagnosed with Early Onset at 60

Before we had to take away car keys and move to 24 hour care I installed video cameras around the home (not bedroom or bathroom) and trackers on the car and keys/wallets etc. This helped monitor safety and progression of the decline. Life360 with phone in car also gives you real time readout of risky behaviors and also will call emergency services in event of accident. God bless and good luck. POA was a key and very useful move.

Welcome. It’s great that you are getting things done. There is just so much to do in the beginning. I have a brother that prefers to keep his head in the sand too, I sympathize. I agree with SDianeL. I was told care level should be just one step ahead of their current needs. She may be fine using the stove today, but will she still be ok with it tomorrow and how are you going to know when that change happens before a fire. People with dementia often have anosognosia. This is an inability to recognize their own symptoms or limitations. It can be very dangerous. She is not going to come to you and tell you she can’t do something. It’s easy for this self confidence to give you the illusion our loved one is capable of more than they really are. My brother said mom was able to do her own laundry, yet I discovered she had run the washer twice and put no clothes in, I made sure she got a new toothbrush every 6 months, when we moved her I discovered she hadn’t actually replaced her toothbrush in 2 years. There are so many little things that we just assume are being done. What kind of access does she have to her finances? What is to stop her from being scammed again? Even if she only has access to a small checking account, she could empty it. You may want to put a hold on her credit. Some have tried to take out a lone to buy a new car at this stage. Driving is about way more than memory. It takes good judgment, reaction time, understanding of complex traffic laws, visual and spatial perception and so much more. I can understand you don’t want to take the car away too soon, but you don’t want to wait til there is an accident or someone gets killed. There is a lot on the line when it comes to driving. And like I said earlier just because she is ok driving today doesn’t mean she will be ok tomorrow. Dementia only progresses. Mom’s neurologist told us she shouldn’t drive and was not safe to live alone. Maybe ask the neurologist their opinion on these things. In my opinion it’s not too early to start thinking about what happens next. Some assisted living facilities can have a waiting list to get in and they can be very expensive. 24/7 in home care is even more expensive. You might want to start thinking about what she can afford. Will you need to sell her house to cover her care? Would she qualify for Medicaid? What does Medicaid cover in your state. When we moved mom to Al I found she enjoyed being around other people and even just having a reason to get dressed in the mornings. She was down and depressed being alone all day. I will attach a few resources. The more you can learn about dementia the better.

https://www.medicaidplanningassistance.org/medicaid-eligibility-income-chart/

https://www.consumerfinance.gov/consumer-tools/managing-someone-elses-money/