Trouble diverting from calling his mother

My DH tells me he wants to go home to his Mom and Dad every morning. I tell him his Mom died 20 years ago and his dad died 40 years ago. I quickly add that my parents have passed away as well as our sister-in-laws parents. Then I say … we were all so fortunate to have wonderful parents. I bring up things I remember about his Mom and he smiles. As long as I end with nice stories about our parents, he is fine. Then I talk about our plans for the day, and he forgets about his parents (until tomorrow morning). I used to try to go along with him … that his parents were alive …and it turned into a confusing mess for both of us.

Found this online:

Whe a person with dementia asks to call their deceased mother, they are often seeking comfort, safety, or nurturing. Validate their feelings by asking about their mom ("What was her best meal?""What color was her hair?") rather than immediately stating she has passed, which can cause fresh, repetitive grief. 

2Effective Strategies

• Validate and Redirect: Say"You're thinking about your mom? She was a wonderful person" then gently transition to"I remember you saying she made the best pies. Let's have a snack" or "Tell me a favorite story about her".

My wife frequently asks if her mom died. She died about a year and a half ago. I give basically the same answer as jsps gives. Yes a long time ago like my mom and dad and her dad and then talk about something else. She doesn't get upset it just helps her move past that thought and on to something else. I think that each case is different and what ever helps stop their anxiety is the right answer. My wife sometimes says her mom came and visited and then I say that was nice and say something else nice about her mom and then talk about something else.