Have any questions about how to use the community? Check out the Help Discussion.

Recs and encourgament

Pearl02
Pearl02 Member Posts: 1 Member
My mom is newly diagnosed with Alzheimer’s at 62. The wait to see a neurologist is 7 months so we are reliant on her PCP. My father is sadly in denial or just needs more time to accept the situation. There are three adult children, two of which live in town. Sadly it feels like symptom wise, she has stepped off a cliff and is in free fall. Every day her symptoms seem to get worse and worse-meltdowns, paranoia, fixations, memory lapses etc. She accepts the memory loss is part of the disease but nothing else. I feel helpless and I don’t know what to do especially since my dad doesn’t seem to be able to snap out of it. We all need time to process this recent diagnosis but it doesn’t feel like we have time given how fast things are moving. Any advice or encouragement would be appreciated!

Comments

  • pamu
    pamu Member Posts: 65
    25 Likes 25 Insightfuls Reactions 10 Comments 5 Care Reactions
    Member

    If you haven't already, get a referral to a geriatric psychiatrist as soon as possible. They can help manage her symptoms with medication.

  • H1235
    H1235 Member Posts: 1,710
    500 Insightfuls Reactions 500 Likes 1000 Comments 250 Care Reactions
    Member

    Welcome. I’m glad you found our group. One of the most important things to be done early on is to see a lawyer. Even if your parents are in denial you might suggest this is simply something that needs to be done because they are getting older. Your dad will need DPOA with you probably named as a backup, a will and living will. Since your mom can no longer make decisions for your dad if he were to have health issues, it would probably be good for him to appoint a DPOA (other than your mom). This is so tough. If he doesn’t recognize her limitations or symptoms (this is common for the person with dementia) he may allow her do things that put her in danger (driving, going for a walk alone, being left home alone). I will attach a staging tool. Maybe seeing her symptoms in on a clear list with stages might help him. Some people really have a rough time accepting. Would he attend some kind of dementia information seminar. I’m so sorry you need to be here.


  • caregiving daughter
    caregiving daughter Member Posts: 52
    Legacy Membership 10 Comments 5 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    If you live near a large metro area, check to see if a university system or research hospital has a memory clinic. The clinic may host a variety of specialties/social workers that focus on dementia diagnosis and potentially allow your mom to be seen much sooner. Another option is to see if you can question the receptionists at the neurology office. My guess is that rather than the neurologist making the diagnosis, a neuro psychologist would need to have an extended visit to provide formal diagnosis and recommended support going forward. If the neurologist's office could confirm that this is the typical approach in your community, it could expedite obtaining a care plan. I don't believe diagnosis can be done from medical scans. It's tough to get a loved one to go through multiple doctors so ensure you understand the steps before-hand.

  • SDianeL
    SDianeL Member Posts: 3,175
    1,500 Likes 1,000 Insightfuls Reactions 2500 Comments 1,000 Care Reactions
    Member

    welcome. Read the book “The 36 Hour Day” and search online for dementia caregiving videos by Teepa Snow or Tam Cummings which are very helpful. Your Mom may not be able to understand she has an illness. It’s called Anosognosia which is a neurological condition causing a person to be unaware of their own cognitive impairments, such as memory loss or confusion. Unlike denial, which is psychological, this lack of insight is caused by brain damage, making the person truly believe they are fine, 

  • Victoriaredux
    Victoriaredux Member Posts: 152
    100 Likes 100 Insightfuls Reactions 100 Comments 25 Care Reactions
    Member
    edited 3:28AM

    If the PCP didn't rule out a UTI have that checked . UTIs can cause rapid decay. Curing it won't cure the dementia but can minimize the damage.

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more