Ambiguous loss

I haven't been here in a long time, hi to all of you who remember me.
Quick background - DH showed signs of dementia somewhere around 18 years ago, before age 45. He's now 62. 4 years ago he moved into memory care, but by that time he was barely walking, didn't know anyone, couldn't eat with utensils, and was peeing everywhere.
Fast forward to today. He's been unable to move on his own for a couple of years. He's in a different section of his facility with full time nursing care. I see no response from him for about anything. He doesn't track with his eyes. He eats pureed food, but still eats when fed and drinks from a straw. On occasion a word will pop out, but it's hard to know if it is really a word or I'm just imagining his sounds. He has NO other health issues except the dementia related issues. There's no telling how long he will continue like this. He's been on hospice 3.5 years. He keeps qualifying with every so slight declines.
When people say early onset is fast, I just want to yell, "LIAR."
I still work full time as a special education teacher. I have to. I'm 58. I was barely 40 when this hell started, and at that time I was a stay-at-home mom. I knew we were losing our main income earner. I worked through the worst of his stages, and hired caregivers. Until it became way too much, and I placed him.
I spent the first 3 years visiting every other day at least. His facility is 45 minutes from my house. It was a commitment, but I felt compelled. Then I took in 3 foster children from my school. Ages 5-12. They needed a home, I provided it. I learned about our foster care system and gave love to them for 10 months. They have now moved and are living with family.
During that time I still visited my husband, but a little less. 2-3 times a week. Shorter visits. Since the kids have moved, I am still visiting 2-3 times a week.
Now that I'm alone again, I have no idea what the hell I am gong to do with my life. Or even want to do. I'm not a widow. I'm still married. But I'm alone. It's a horrible place to be. I know I can make plans for my future, and that's easier to understand than it was 5 years ago. But not easier to do.
This hell can go on forever. It's better now than it was at any time along this path. At least I get sleep. But it is still a path I don't want to be on. I spent the last 2 weeks dealing with hospice and his facility calling daily due to an illness and updating me. That's wonderful to be updated and have so many people caring about him. It was a flu with significant congestion and fluid in his lungs - he's over it now. But it's also stress. This could go on for years yet. Or it could end next week. But I think it will be years.