Struggle with clothing

Maybe you should try to find replicas of what she’s currently wearing. At least they would be fresh.

I have had so many problems with clothes. When mom was first diagnosed she was quite thin and had nothing that fit her. She was actually wearing clothes that had belonged to her granddaughter (not appropriate for her, it was bad). I took her shopping for a new night gown (that’s a simple easy purchase, right). She was looking a black, lace, silk nighties 🙄. Another time she bought tye dye tennis shoes (nothing she would have ever bought before). Another time I brought her clothes shopping and she had the cart loaded with everything but clothes (things she did not need). I finally just bought her a whole new wardrobe, but she didn’t like me doing it and was not happy with me. About 6 months ago she insisted she needed more pants. She needs pull on pants, not to tight around the ankles but not huge bell bottoms, very stretchy, pockets, dark colors, not too expensive, nothing cropped and easy colors to mix and match. If the pants I get are too long she insists on keeping them and just hemming them up herself (not going to happen), she gets mad when I insist on bringing them back. I really don’t know what she has and what fits at this point (she was diagnosed 3 years ago, so I really don’t know what’s in her closet). I suggested we pull everything out and go through it to figure it out. She tells me “I don’t need you to help me figure it out. I told you I need more pants!” I got her a pair before Christmas, but she insisted she could take them down to laundry and have them marked herself. She got so snippy with me I said fine. A month later they were gone and she is mad at the facility for losing them (I’m pretty sure she never had them marked). Lesson learned! She insists xl is too big and will tell me they don’t fit out of spite. I think I have bought and taken back at least 5 pair of pants with only one that fit. Another pair she said she liked and fit, but they don’t have pockets and she says she will never wear them (only after they were labeled and it’s too late to take back). This has caused me so much time, energy and stress! And she is annoyed with me over it after all the effort I put into it. Sorry I got off on my own little rant there. So no, you are not alone in this struggle. Im sorry, I have no advice since I can’t seem to figure it out myself. Good luck.

It is possible that, as @persevere suggests, replicas may help some. I think that many PWD lose interest in variety.

After dealing with clothes going missing in MC and noticing that the same clothes kept getting worn over and over and over, I am now buying exact replicas of the same things whenever possible. My dad is now wearing duplicates of the same pair of pants every day (same color, even), and although the shirts vary in color, they’re the same style and have similar fabric. I did a pants purchase recently: same things but a smaller size. Clothes wear out quickly, but they are not going missing as often.

But my dad does not object to my going through his closet. The duplicate clothes scheme only works in some situations.

I wish I had advice. My mom's clothing issues have been one of the biggest of our frustrations. She is in MC now and I do most of her laundry. She likes to hand wash some of her items herself, I think mainly due to boredom. She has a very limited wardrobe and keeps them in two plastic bins under her bed. She refuses to put any clothes in her dresser or closet. Her reasoning is that when she leaves MC for good she can just grab the bins. She continually folds and refolds her clothing in those bins. She refuses to keep more than 3 or 4 shirts, 3 pairs of pants, 3 nightgowns and limited underwear and socks. She says that people take them…they don't. She's been throwing away underwear weekly for years….I know because I've been buying them for her. I bought her new sneakers for Mother's Day - she loved them. My sister went to see her yesterday afternoon and my mom said that she was going to put her old shoelaces on the new pair. My sister made the mistake of asking her why she would do that because the new ones are nicer. Mom got upset at her question, basically saying it was her decision. My sister had to leave a couple minutes after because mom was giving her the silent treatment. My guess is that their clothing is one of the things they can control (while they can). It's so difficult.

I'm wondering if you could find some replicas, maybe at a thrift store, and tell your mom you just "found" them (maybe in the basement or the back of the laundry room) so they were hers all along! :-)