Burner Phone, Google Voice . . . Self-Care

pjasso · May 17

I'm new to this group, just over a week in and it has been a life saver to me. I feel I have found "my people'. Thank you ! My mom in early-mid stage Alz is in AL without leveled support. I live half mile down the road; she texts and calls me constantly, I'm her "person"; often she is demanding or in "need" even though it isn't a high level need. I totally get it, and am empathetic as it must be so hard to be stuck in a residence and not be able to get what you want or need . . . but her constant texts were giving me a stomach ache and I couldn't ignore them. Checking them was like a morbid curiosity!

One member suggested getting a burner phone— GREAT IDEA. So I did bought one and was in process of getting a plan, but then my son mentioned Google Voice. I decided against the extra phone and have set up Google Voice w/ text and VM. I replaced my contact info from my mom's phone with my new number and I put the Google Voice app on the 2nd page of my phone, so I don't "see" it. I check it twice a day, and send her a pleasant morning greeting and then an evening greeting before she goes down for dinner (important, as dinner is a great distraction). If there is something urgent, the AL will call me, or I will ask my husband to check her texts to see if it is something important.

Wow! such a simple change, but my stress stomach is gone! We all need to find ways to take care of ourselves— my mom is physically incredibly healthy and strong and so I'm in this for the long haul. Stay strong and healthy if you can!

kscott14537 · May 19

I'm in the same boat with my mother in law. It is a good day if there are less than 20 calls. Doesn't she panic when you don't answer? If I don't answer the phone she panics and it increases the number of calls.

pjasso · May 20

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/272799#Comment_272799

I wouldn't call it panicking for my mom, but sometimes yes, some days she gets more incessant in her repeat calls and will even call my husband, who doesn't pick up. But what I'm doing instead is sending her two loving, reassuring text messages (via Google Voice), one in the morning and one right before she goes down for dinner, which is strategic on my part. Once she hears from me, she identifies me as "available" and will repeatedly call with various reasons. But she really likes going downstairs to socialize with her table group over a glass of wine before dinner is served, so I send my evening greeting at 4:15. I say pretty much the same thing, and in the morning, I will say, "I'm off to work now, I'll connected with you later today".

Burner Phone, Google Voice . . . Self-Care

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