In need of advice on having a certified caregiver come in

pd2205 · June 10

Hello all.

It has been a minute since I have written here on the forum. I want to be more active here, but I am more so often on the Reddit forums.

To preface, I am 21 years old and still living at home. Currently on Summer break and just got a new job that I am starting Monday. Mom has Alzheimers, dad and I are primary caregivers. Dad works 9-5, and I am about to start working 9-5 as well. Mom is recently diagnosed but rapidly declining. I would say she is at a late stage 4.

Dad is hard when it comes to all of this. We are both very familiar with the disease being that both my grandmothers have had it. But when it comes to his wife, he is still in denial about some things. I think he knows it's time for caregiving but I think it's hard for him to actually bite the bullet on it. My siblings are at little to no help in this situation given that they are all at distance away and caring for young children of their own. I don't want mom to be alone all day, but I don't think dad is ready to get a caregiver, how can I go about talking to him?

H1235 · June 11

If he doesn’t like the idea of a stranger in his home, you might look to see if there is a elder day program she could attend (daycare for elderly). You might try pointing out how much danger she could put herself in. Many with dementia have anosognosia. This is an inability to recognize their symptoms or limitations. She may decide to bake bread and catch the house on fire, if there was a fire (regardless of how it started) would she know what to do, would she try to put out the fire vs getting out, what if she decided to go for a walk and got lost. People with dementia are aging in reverse. The things they can do just fine today may be a problem tomorrow. It’s important to stay ahead of things to keep her safe. Would he listen to a doctor? Could it be brought up at her next appointment. We used in home cameras for a while, but in an emergency (house on fire) I’m not sure how much good they would do. When my mom lived with my brother he worked full time. Mom was home alone all day. She had nothing to do and no one to talk to. Some days she didn’t even get dressed. She did so much bettering in Al. She participated in activities and made new friends. A day program may would the same way for you. I will attach a few resources just in case you haven’t seen them yet.

I hope you can get through to him.

understanding-the-dementia-experience.pdf

DBAT.pdf

Anosognosia and Dementia - AgingCare.com.pdf

In need of advice on having a certified caregiver come in

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