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My dad diagnosed with slight dementia

Devika06
Devika06 Member Posts: 1 New
Hi everyone, happy there's a group for people like myself. First off my dad was rushed to the ER 2 years ago for DKS ( diabetic ketoacidosis) 1 week later after being discharged got a stroke and about 2 months later got prostate cancer. We then did a test that his neurologist sent him to complete about 1 year ago and they stated he has slight dementia. He's in remission now and taking insulin 4 times a day and wasn't left any disabilities from his stroke, just can operate a vehicle due to having mini episodes once in a while. What I'm in need of is how to deal with his mood swings and his change of personalities. There's days or weeks where he'll be in a place that he doesn't talk to anyone doesn't want to do anything at all just sit and walk from his chair in the living room to the outside and sit. My mom feels it more since she's home all day with him. It's like he's rude to her if she ask him to do anything and he looks like he's in a daze. I really don't know if this is dementia or his him. I've tried to get him in with a therapist but they won't make an appt until they speak with and he doesn't want that. I got him in a group therapy for his cancer and he refused. I even enroll him in yoga and he doesn't want to go. I'm running out of options. Who do I see or go too for his dementia care. Any advise I would greatly appreciate it.

Comments

  • H1235
    H1235 Member Posts: 2,339
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    Welcome. A geriatric physic is really considered the best for this, but there may be a long wait to get in and that’s if you even have one in your area. Some primary care physicians are willing to prescribe these medications, but not all. My mom’s neurologist was willing, but others have said the neurologist was not helpful with this. What you are describing sounds very familiar and I think in line with dementia. I doubt yoga or therapy will be much help and if he is resistant, it’s not worth the argument. My mom sees a counselor, but I don’t think it does any good, but it give her a chance to rant about how awful I am (she doesn’t believe there is anything wrong with her and thinks she has no business being in a nursing home). Many with dementia have anosognosia and are not able to recognize their symptoms or limitations. If these are pointed out to a pwd they can become angry. If he is being asked to do something that is too difficult for him he may also lash out. Since your mom is probably providing most of his care he may direct his anger and resentment towards her, blaming her for all the things he is struggling with. My mom blames me for everything! Lack of interest or motivation in doing things is a common symptom. I will add a few links that may be helpful since you are new here. I think the more you and your mom can learn about dementia the better you will be at interacting with him and understanding what he is going through.

    https://iona.org/therapeutic-fibs-ok/

  • harshedbuzz
    harshedbuzz Member Posts: 6,936
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    @Devika06

    Hi and welcome. I am sorry for your reason to be here but pleased you found this place.

    You've already gotten some excellent insight from H1235. FWIW, I have never heard of a person having "slight dementia". Do you attend dad's appointments or is this your mom's (or dad's) translation of what was said? (A second set of ears at appointments is always a good thing) Normally physicians use a 3-stage model to describe stages of dementia which is a life-limiting and progressive condition. The 3 stages are mild, moderate and severe and are based loosely on treatment options. There's also MCI. Docs often use MCI as a working diagnosis initially at the time of the evaluation and then change it to dementia at a 6 or 12-month follow-up appointment if there's been any change.

    All that said, you and your mom are the experts on dad's current baseline— The DBAT is easy for caregivers to use to suss that out. Generally speaking, a PWD is said to be in the latest stage for which they have a symptom or behavior. Also, a PWD doesn't have to tick all the boxes to be in a stage. Many PWD seem to have a foot in two stages simultaneously.

    Therapy is generally pointless for a PWD. Therapy requires skills that are no longer available to a PWD like short-term memory needed to learn new strategies and the executive function to recognize when it's time to employ those strategies. There are also changes in mood and personality that impact willingness to participate— apathy (no real interest), loss of empathy (no concern for one's mood on others), anosognosia (no recognition of a need to work on this) and lack of social filter (if they're grumpy, it'll be obvious).

    While therapy isn't a path to improving day-to-day, psychoactive medications are generally very helpful. I would suggest a geriatric psychiatrist. They are the subspecialists most qualified to manage such medications in the elderly and PWD. Given his diabetes, I'd make a special effort to see a geri psych as some classes of meds used to impact blood sugar for some. Is mom overseeing dad's insulin; at some point caregivers need to take this task over for their PWD.

    HB

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more