Negative Nellie here

B Lynn · 2:18AM

My therapist wants me to journal something positive or a good thing that happens to me each day. I’m finding that difficult. Today I went to the dentist to have my teeth cleaned & checked. The dentist found a cavity. It’s the story of my life anymore. I really cannot find the good. My husband’s memory lapses are progressing. I have a number of my own medical problems I’m dealing with. I’m starting to feel like I’m in my 90’s rather that early 70’s. Like the rest of you, this is not how I envisioned life in the 7th decade. I HATE it! I don’t want a damn new normal. I don’t want anything to do with this whole damned situation. There is no need to respond. I know the rest of you are facing the same ugly reality. I just felt the need to write. Thanks for the opportunity to post here.

Russinator · 4:07AM

((HUGS))

Karen711 · 5:28AM

💜

Biggles · 9:24AM

it’s crap, the whole thing is horrible, demoralising and sad beyond anyone’s expectations. I couldn’t agree more with you. Definately not the happy retirement cruising that some of my friends are going on and they don’t even want to talk to me anymore because they can’t cope and think it’s catching. My DH has only me to protect him, feed him, talk to him and love him it’s crap.

Snipe · 10:29AM

I, and I’m sure others agree with you. Yesterday was one of “those” days for me and I was just glad when it was over. Today is a new day and we’ll start everything again. No, definitely not our 70’s that we envisioned, but sadly we endured the best we can for now. You’re not alone.

CharlieS · 10:51AM

B Lynn, thank you for posting what I could have posted myself ! I’m sorry you are dealing with this, but I’m glad to know there are others who are as sick of it as I am ! Not the retirement any of us anticipated.

B Lynn · 11:16AM

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/275798#Comment_275798

It is Biggles. I totally can relate. I’m happy for my friends & family members who are living their best lives, but seeing the FB posts became too much. Seeing pics of them with their grands when mine are over 2K miles away & seeing all the posts of their retirement travels was making me sad for my losses so I ended up unfollowing them so their wonderful lives weren’t being thrown in my face daily, reminding me that not all of us get that happy retirement we looked forward to. It’s helped but yesterday became too much. I’m so sorry for what you are going through. My heart goes out to you. Thanks for sharing. Hugs. 💜

B Lynn · 11:25AM

Thank you, CharlieS. I’m sorry you are feeling the same way. Those who aren’t going through it don’t get it. You aren’t alone, even though in the what shall I call it, unaffected, or “normal” world it feels like it. I know it’s all a process, or “Journey” as the site App is called. A “journey” none of us ever anticipated. Thanks again for sharing. Hugs 💜

jgreen · 11:39AM

🙏 💝

annie51 · 11:55AM

I used to chuckle to myself when I heard people complaining about this and that and thinking OMG I used to think those things were important too. If they only knew what we go through…I agree with Biggles - it’s crap! I did journal and tried to come up with at least one “daily joy” and many days that section was empty.

Sending hugs to you!

dayn2nite2 · 12:11PM

Does the therapy benefit you? I would think about that and decide weather to even continue with it. There is nothing incorrect or wrong with hating your life, and it's pretty tone-deaf for someone to tell you to find a good thing to journal about daily. With dementia, sometimes there is nothing.

I'm a very practical person, and a therapist like this would seem to me to be more trouble than it's worth, but if you get something out of the therapy, then of course keep going. It might be more therapeutic to sit in a park and watch birds than have to do these tasks.

B Lynn · 1:53PM

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/275812#Comment_275812

Thank you. My therapist seems to think I have a negative view on life situations in general. I sometimes wonder if she lived my reality she would still think that. Anyway, I guess she thinks if I try some cognitive behavioral therapy exercises and find something good that has happened to me each day it will change my thinking. I’m game. I’ll try. I understand your empty pages. Thanks for sharing. 💜

B Lynn · 2:02PM

I’ve been talking with her for over a year. I’m not sure I’m any better but at least it’s someone to talk to. My friends don’t want to continuously hear from me my life sucks. My brother isn’t an empathetic listener, either. Like my therapist, he thinks I view life through a negative prism. Maybe I do. No one but people here who are in our shoes know what it’s like to watch everyone live their best lives while we can’t. She thinks my world is too small & that I don’t see that other people are in bad situations also. Well, I’m sorry but that’s my reality. So anyway, I have to start writing what I’m thankful for & a good thing that happened every day. I guess I’m grateful that things aren’t worse! Thanks for sharing. 💜

Negative Nellie here

Comments

Commonly Used Abbreviations

Community Guidelines

Categories