Working While Taking Care Of Mom - Thoughts?

mrider82
mrider82 Member Posts: 19
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I go home Wednesday's around 4:30 (get there about 5:30) after work and then on Thursday I work from their house. I do "like" the slight distraction but today I decided I needed to take the day off from work because the weather is going to be awful and I know my mom won't be happy about that.

Did I make the right decision to take the day off from work? I am full of anticapatory grief right now that my mom won't have a good day tomorrow as she hasn't been "great" the last few days

My mom likes to go for walks because we got her a chariot wheelchair and when it's pouring rain we obviously won't go but that also means we won't really be able to get out of the house. I felt as if I should just take the day off from work, not get up early as I do when I work and rest a little bit longer and just spend the entire day being able to completely focus on my mom and help out my dad and mom

Comments

  • Emily 123
    Emily 123 Member Posts: 1,008
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    Whatever you decide to do to pace yourself to try to preserve a good emotional and physical state is the right decision for you. If your mom were still whole and able to assess the situation she’d want that for you. It’s easy to feel guilty if you take time for your own needs and plans, even when you know that back in ‘normal times’ your mom would have been fine with any decision you make. If you’re starting to feel run down, take some ‘me’ time. Consider if it might help to have an aide come in during the day to give dad a break and reduce the work on your end after working all day. They can do laundry, light meal prep, etc.

  • mrider82
    mrider82 Member Posts: 19
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    I only come home Wednesday after work and work Thursday and leave around 7:30pm After dinner Thursday. I was coming like 4-5 days a week statying over but I was getting burnt out. So I stopped and did the Wed/Thurs thing. My dad does have a lady from Monday, Tuesday and Friday from 1-4 so that's excellent. My mom does like her a lot, which is great! I work when I get home on Thursdays but tomorrow as the weather is going to be terrible I felt like I had to take tomorrow off in case my mom gets upset for not being able to get outside for a walk and to be there to help my dad fully instead of having a little bit of time to work. I feel like if I were working tomorrow I wouldn't have my full attention to my mom and I have a bad feeling my time will be needed tomorrow. Though it could just be the Anticipatory grief kicking in

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
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