Interacting with family

Oh my gosh, this sounds so familiar! My DH has three siblings and he has had lovely long phone conversations with each of them (they all live far away). Then a few hours after each call (and for the next several days), he gets very upset/obsessed about the "fight" that he had on the phone and how they are so cruel to him. There is no distraction and it's very upsetting for both of us. I'm trying to get an appointment with a geriatric psychiatrist to change his meds and work on the constant confabulation and agitation. PCP and neurologist both say that he is maxed out on his current drug regimen and will need to see geri-psych.

He also has initiated plans to go to lunch or breakfast with friends (with me arranging transportation and inviting families to join) but always cancels on the specific day because he doesn't feel well. I have decided that we can't continue to cancel on these folks and will need to just host gatherings at home since his participation is so unreliable. Probably will need to just set things up without telling him, since the anticipatory anxiety is paralyzing for him.