Paranoia

debbuck1960 · September 19

Hi I'm on here.
My partner of 20 years has was diagnosed with early onset alzheimers 18 months ago.
We went awy on a short holiday to greece last week and it was a nightmare.
My partner accused me of having sex with other men in the hotel toilet.

Michele P · September 19

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/77138/paranoia

Welcome. Whoever has DPOA and/ or HIPPA forms signed by your partner allowing access is the person who legally can handle his medical care and can discuss his medical condition with doctors. I would recommend that that person contacts your partner’s neurologist and/or geriatric psychiatrist immediately to discuss this behavior. Medication can be prescribed that will help. This is not uncommon behavior.

BPS · September 19

My wife made accusations about me being unfaithful for several years. At first I tried to get her to tell me why she thought that and tried to explain that things didn't happen. That didn't do any good. The only thing I could do was leave the room for a little while or just sit quietly (in her case she didn't stay on the subject as long as I didn't respond) and then come back and change the subject. I never convinced her but I was able to get her mind off it for a while.

Arrowhead · September 19

Reasoning with them is useless; their "reasoner" is broken and can't be fixed. All you can do is try to work around it.

Bacciammo · September 20

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/77138/paranoia

Every time I go anywhere with makeup or nice clothes on my DH thinks I’m meeting some guy. It’s insane. He’s mild cognitive but is getting worse. He’s on anxiety meds but delusions happen during the mid stage I’ve heard —especially paranoia. It’s so annoying and frustrating

laurieannam · September 20

My husband has been accusing me of having sexual relations with every and all males I’ve come in contact with. Including relatives, for years.

I wish I had an answer on how to convince yours and mine to realize these accusations are unreal. Sadly, it is a common delusion confirmed by his neurologist. Like others have noted their reasoner is broken.

The best I could do is change the subject. My husband will forever think I have had and still am having some wild rock star sex life.

It’s painful but you have to try to put it aside. Wonder why he is not accusing me of being a secret pianist instead.

SDianeL · September 20

Delusions, hallucinations and confabulation are common in dementia. My DH would have delusions, hallucinations & confabulations after watching the news or watching a movie. He couldn't separate things on TV from reality. Remember it's the dementia talking, not your partner. Don't argue or try to defend yourself. It won't work. You can't reason with someone whose "reasoner" is broken. Try redirecting by changing the subject or offering a treat. Many say to apologize and promise never to do it again, then change the subject or offer a treat. I never had to do that. Your partner's world is falling apart and you are his anchor. I know it hurts but try not to take it personally. Read the book "The 36 Hour Day" and search online for dementia caregiving videos by Tam Cummings or Teepa Snow. They may have a video with tips on this subject.

Paranoia

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