DW with VD, repetitious questions and stories

Dougslack1948 · October 19

How should I respond to the same question multiple times everyday.

Maru · October 19

I used to ask God to give me patience, so he gave my DH ALZ so I could practice it. Sometimes when he is re-telling the story for the umpteenth times I just smile, and nod while silently saying a prayer. If you are not a praying person, try counting. Ditto on repeated questions.

fesk · October 19

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/77377/dw-with-vd-repetitious-questions-and-stories

Do the questions differ day to day or do they usually involve the same concern? If the questions are different, it is best to just answer the question each time. You may also try to then interest her in doing something else which may stop the repeated questions for a time. If the questions involve the same concern, you may be able to address the underlying concern which may improve the situation.

Anna2022 · October 19

Answer in the simplest possible way, then redirect. Do it again. Rinse, repeat. This was a most frustrating stage for me but it will pass, eventually. Good luck!

Rellie76 · October 19

We are going thru this now. Its making me more insane. Our adult dtr who lives with us took a few days vacation and basically all day long he is asking me where is she when will she be back how is she getting home etc. He also has aphasia and asks me to tell him the word of the place he went when he was a child. I have no idea. He knows there is something wrong with his brain but doesn't understand. Its heartbreaking and nerve-wracking all at the same time. I have no answers for you but you are not alone.

Dougslack1948 · October 20

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/284499#Comment_284499

The same questions "What are we doing today". Multiple times a day.

fesk · October 20

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/284565#Comment_284565

If it's early in the progression, having a calendar or message board may be helpful. If it's later and that won't help, I would simply answer with whatever you are doing at the moment. Like, right now we are going to have lunch and then discuss what's being made, etc. Or, right now we are going to watch this movie, it's about…., right now we are going do a little laundry, can you help fold these… I think you have to answer the questions and try to start a conversation or activity to help keep her busy with something for a while.

camrun · October 21

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/77377/dw-with-vd-repetitious-questions-and-stories

I get it and am there with you. My husband gets so embarrassed when he realizes he’s asking the same question again that it breaks my heart. I try to remember that feeling and when he does it again I try (and don’t always succeed) to avoid the preamble “as we discussed” or “as I shared” and just remind myself that I’m glad he’s still here. I guess I remind myself that if I can ease his anxiety by responding each time as if it’s the first, I can help him have the best day possible.

countrywife · October 21

In my DH’s mind it’s the first time he’s asking so I try to follow suit and in my mind, it’s the first time I’m hearing it. Altho I must be honest and say he doesn’t repeat questions with any regularity at this time. Generally it’s when there’s a big change or something is weighing heavily on his mind.

KDSG · October 22

My DH does the same thing. I try to keep answering even though it might be the 10th time he has asked the same question. If I start to feel really exasperated I’ll write the answer on a pad for him to read. He will then read it over and over but it does help him.

H1235 · October 22

I remember someone here said they made a bit of a mental game of it for themselves and tried to see how many different ways they could respond to the same question. Obviously trying to avoid upsetting their loved one. I don’t know that there is much you can do really. It is maddening. You can change the subject, but the same topic is just going to come up again.

jgreen · October 22

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/77377/dw-with-vd-repetitious-questions-and-stories

Hi, @Dougslack1948

Here is a nice video about repetitive questions by Dr. Natalie Edmonds, Careblazers. Other health professionals that are good resources are Tam Cummings, Teepa Snow, and Camille .

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oF4bLt68SDY

RedLeg · October 22

Hi Dougslack1948,

At least your DW or DH is talking and asking questions. My DW hardly talks anymore, only when spoken to, and quite short answers. At times, I actually miss the repetitive questions, as opposed to the awful silence.

/STEVE · October 22

I feel your pain. I have found I get this when I am not holding up my end of the conversation. DW will start filling in the quiet spots with these question, over and over. I have a hard time talking about nothing, but I have learn to talk about the color of the walls, does she think the ceiling should have been tall, just anything my eye land on, If i can keep the quiet spots short enough the question stop.

Last week she keep putting thing by the door and I ask her what she was doing, she said it was stuff she wanted to take home, we have lived here for 30 years, Then she started taking picture off the walls to take home. I just went into my normal mode and got upset. and convinced her to take a nap so I could have a time out.

DW with VD, repetitious questions and stories

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