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How to support my stepdad as primary caregiver
Hello. I am new to this platform. My mom is in Stage 6 of Alzheimer's. My stepdad is her primary caregiver. I can see that he is in over his head and is stressing out. But he is shutting out ideas for support, saying that he can't handle any more information. He is trying to do everything himself, and I can see the…
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Short term memory and spouse
I am 56 and started having memory issues this year and seems more prevalent recently. I dont have a diagnosis yet and see the neurologist in Nov. A recent example is my wife and I went on a hot air balloon ride in Africa. 8 days later she told friends we took the balloon ride and I interrupted her and said no we didnt. I…
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For Older Unmarried Couples, Caregiving Obligations Can Be Murky
Gifted link from the NYT. An article about caregiving issues specific to older unmarried couples. https://www.nytimes.com/2024/11/10/health/elderly-unmarried-couples-caregiving.html?unlocked_article_code=1.ZE4.JvyT.QUUSabGS4hNM&smid=url-share
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BIGGEST FEAR, DW MC and what about the whole SEX in MC with others?
Help me navigate the negative thoughts I am feeling. Let me start by stating. I am feeling a tremendous amount of grief. The person in my wife’s very fragile frail body is not the woman I married. I must now consider placement In a memory care home, but I cannot shake this. I have been taking care of her 24/7 now for over…
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Parent with Early Onset Alzheimer's
Hi, I'm looking for a support group specifically for adult children of parents with early onset alzheimers. My mother is in her mid-60s and was diagnosed a couple years ago. As she is beginning to decline more and more I want to connect with others in a similar set of circumstances. Most people I speak with are dealing…
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Parallel living
Not sure how else to describe this but DH constantly refers to our "Other house"? Which he says is identical to this one, but he wants to take his belongings there. I'm continually putting things in our car for the "morning" to be taken there. After he goes to bed I take them out of the car and put them away. Sometimes…
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Difficult and lonely
I had a friend disable DH truck. He went berserk. He is still upset after 7 days of trying to get me to have it fixed. Now he is upset over some scam. All his cards are locked. Our retirement money was moved to a brokerage firm. Thank goodness. I took him to the bank to withdraw cash, he randomly walked into a bankers…
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Challenges over Loss of Control
Good afternoon! I'm a brand-new poster and am an only child to my 79-year-old mom with VD. She's in memory care and has been in decline for years, with bigger deficits after stroke-type symptoms and multiple falls. Over the past year, she's become more paranoid and accusatory about my not visiting enough, the management of…
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She is the Love of My Life, will she come back for a moment?
My DW, first showed signs of mild cog impairment during covid, July of 2020. Sill very mild what everyone thought was stress related. Then in 2/2022 we both were infected with a severe. Case of covid with brain fog, that I have been able to recover from. Not so luck has been my DW, although I have made many efforts since…
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Support for the spouses or partners of dementia caregivers!
:/ Is there any information on support groups for the spouses or partners or the caregivers or info on what it can do to a relationship or marriage? Any information is greatly appreciated!
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DH seems to hate me now
DH diagnosed with vascular dementia in 2020 still drives well and manages independently but lately he refuses to return from our mountain cabin or even see me because he says I’m too controlling. It doesn’t matter what I do or say; he finds everything controlling. He’s essentially run away from home (with the dog). Is this…
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Memory Care or Keep trying at home
Is there some magic way to know when the time is right to have your loved one in a Memory Care Facility? A tipping point? I don't want to, for some reason. But I'm exhausted . I feel it would be more for me than him if he went there. Is that the right reason? He is still considered early stage. But the care needed is…
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New to this forum. Diagnosed over 4 years ago
Not sure if this is the place to introduce myself; but I had Encephalitis twice - from West Nile Virus and Powassan Virus AND Lyme Disease 7 times. Dr. told me the viruses started this ball rolling. I was doing well, dealing with changes in my life, except not driving. I haven't accepted that well. I've been going between…
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Mother-in-law with Alzheimer's diagnosis refusing treatment/diagnosis
Hi all, I am new to this forum. My mother-in-law was diagnosed with early stages of Alzheimer's about nine months ago. Since then, it has been an uphill (upmountain?) battle. She has refused to accept the diagnosis and will not return to see her neurologist despite MRI and cognitive confirmation of the disease. She has…
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From The NYT: The Ethicist- Spouse with Dementia
I have so many thoughts on this starting with "has this columnist ever lived with a PWD?" https://www.nytimes.com/2024/06/14/magazine/husband-dementia-divorce-ethics.html?unlocked_article_code=1.z00.2GoA.8KLGpmxh2ufJ&smid=url-share
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Navigating Family Dynamics: Post removed
Post removed
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How do you process your thoughts, feelings, and slow burning grief?
Hi everyone. I’m new here. So glad I found this online community. The last three years have been super intense. From my mother getting diagnosed to losing her job to hiring at-home care, and the moving to assisted living in Jan 2023. This is a short summary, of course. But now she needs 24/7 supervision and it’s just SO…
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Not Diagnosed yet
I have been left with the responsibility of caring solely for my grandmother who is showing very progressed signs of dementia. My issue is, how do I get her a diagnosis and help, if she refuses to go to the doctor and her son (who is states away) has POA over her and refuses to acknowledge there is a medical need? I am so…
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Separating Parents in AL - How to handle the physical move itself?
Suggestions for Thursday's move? We have to: Tell our mother (stage 6a/6b with anosognosia) we have decided that she and Daddy need separate rooms in order to receive the care they each need Respond to her confusion, frustration, fear, and anger (her symptoms manifest with great anger) Support our dad (who already knows…
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ALSP support group
My mom was DX with ALSP it’s a rare/genetic for of Alzheimer.. I was wondering if there was any type of support groups even virtual support groups that anybody has or has gone through that could help me. I love to join a support group, but I don’t know where to start, Can guide me?
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My DW & Hospice Education
Today, my DW of 25 years was released from the ravages of of this evil disease (+ cancer) and is, truly, in a better place. I was lucky enough to be by her side, holding her hand, when she passed. And I might have been alarmed at the changes she underwent, if not for having learned about the signs and sounds and changes…
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Grandmothers recent diagnosis - guidance
Hi everyone! My grandmother, and very best friend, was formally diagnosed with Alzheimer’s yesterday. We knew this was coming, as her mother had it and she began showing signs about a year ago. However, I feel so completely lost and heartbroken. I was hoping for a bit of guidance on how to handle the utter darkness I feel.…
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Competely overwhelmed and in tears or on the verge of tears ALWAYS
Hi all! I'm new here. My 59 yo DH was diagnosed with early onset alzheimer's and primary progressive aphasia in Sept 2020. He was able to continue working until Dec of 22. He's been home and frustrated and bored and angry since then. He gets so confused and believes things that haven't happened. Sees things and people do…
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Sex is not my friend
DH has been quiet about this for several months now. All of the sudden now he wants it again (he also has ED and things were not going well before). He grabbed a beer when we got home from church and then wanted to get all frisky. Unfortunately, I made the remark that he looked like he was more worried about getting a beer…
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It's so lonely
hi I am Amy (61) and my husband (64) was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's in June 2023. Since I am also disabled I knew we had to get out of our house and into a care environment before disaster struck. We are in a really nice Assisted Living place now. Currently Ive been feeling lonely even though we're together all…
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Children of parent's who have died from Alzheimer's
I have been the caregiver for my mother for the last 16 years. This August she died from the disease. I have not been able to find a single book or group about this and find it very frustrating. I thought since I grieved the loss of my mother for the 16 years that her death would be easier. Stupid I know....this is hard as…
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Wife refuses medical help
After 3-4 years of increasing memory loss, Finlay was able to get DW to her PCP (prescribed sertraline for anxiety) and neurophysiological testing. Diagnosed with presumptive AD but she is in denial and refuses further follow up. Related: about 12 months ago she began to not recognize me. Not sure what to do
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Suggestions please
Hey everybody, 1st time posting. I noticed hubby having memory loss and confusion over a year ago, he is 52. Last July, he ended up in the hospital for a week, and scans confirmed something was going on in the area of his memory and emotions. Bad short-term memory loss, can't remember places he went the same day, says he…
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Mom thinks I’m wearing a mask
Hi all! For the past few months my mom has made comments about how I am not her daughter although I look like her. She has made comments about me wearing such a good mask because I look so much like her daughter. She also says that her daughter hates her and does not want to be around her so I cannot be her daughter when I…