Anxiety about upcoming assessment

Karras_granddaughter

The day is finally here, my grandmother is going to get assessed for her COPES/LTC application. I am terrified that for whatever reason, she will fail it. Like, she will have a really good day and they will say she is fine, when really, she needs her caregiver there all the time. If she doesn't get approved for some crazy reason, I literally do not know what will happen next to her. 

I'm super scared! I have to assume that the person doing the assessment recognizes good days and bad days for dementia. The anxiety is high though-I'm still in the midst of finding her a place too, which is no easy task either. That is a demoralizing never-ending road of phone calls. 

Suzzin

When I took my mom, I wrote a letter in advance for the doctor, detailing all the things that I just couldn't say in front of her. Sometimes they can pull it together ("showtiming"), but if you really need help you'll have to be brutal in your letter. And then when they ask questions don't jump in and help. It's so hard, letting them fail, but it's so important.

Cynbar

Most people with dementia minimize their limitations, think they are fine and tell everyone else that. The assessment will be looking for how much help she needs on a daily basis, so make sure they get that information. Write a letter explaining how much help she gets with bathing, dressing, toileting, med management, meal prep,  walking, safety. Don't depend on her to answer questions accurately. If she can't manage several of those independently, she should have no trouble being approved.