7 mos in to the Alz journey...

koontzka

46 y/o daughter still raising teenagers; 76 y/o mom moved in with early stage diagnosis. Just looking for comraderie, hope and guidance. *at this time I am her temporary caregiver, younger sibling will take over daily support in 3 mos.

solerdr

Good morning.

You have come to the right place for support!

You are definitely not alone in this journey and there are a number of good support people on this forum.

One of the most important things to remember as you start this journey is that YOU and your sibling also need to take care of yourselves. Often times it is the caretakers who get worn out and the patients (the ones with ALZs) are just fine.

Therapeutic lying to your mother is an act of love. In my case "dad, you already had your candy bar for the day." Or when I had to leave after visiting him in the memory care facility "I'll be back in an hour after my meeting dad." "Mom's at an appointment" or "on a trip and will be back tomorrow."

Arguing with them or trying to correct them on their "facts" may lead to anger, depression, sadness, or a host of other issues.

Telling them "remember" does more harm than good as they do not nor will they remember.

They are not intentionally saying or doing things, it is the disease.

Stepping into their world does a great deal of good for the caregivers. I once read that a man caring for his father who had ALZs literally would take a step to the left and think to himself "I am stepping into my dad's world." I too did this with my father.

Whenever a loved one tells us a story or says something we know not to be true, simply say "okay", or "that's right", "yes"...in essence agree with them as the "facts" do not really matter.

Every ALZ's patient is different as is the journey for caregivers as this disease is a mystery and affects peole in different ways.

Here for your.

May God's light guide your day and His spirit bring you peace.

Damion

cgodfrey

I am a 47 year old daughter of a 72 year old mom with Alzheimer’s. My dad is the primary caregiver, but I understand the stress of being in between kids and my parent. My kids both have autism, so it is a whole lot to manage. My mom’s agitation sets off my daughter with autism and intense anxiety. I feel guilty for not being able to be around my mom more often.

turquoiseandadobe

37 y/o daughter raising a 4 year old. My 72 y/o Mother was recently diagnosed with early stage Alzheimer’s. We are currently 6 hours apart. My Dad passed away last summer after a battle with amyloidosis. I am my Mother’s only child, and also her temporary caregiver. My Mom is very resistant to the idea of moving closer to my family, she has lived in the same city her entire life. I am having a lot of anxiety about being sandwiched between supporting her from so far away and raising my young child.