Caregivers need to know this.

FloydSnax

I was deep in it a few months ago. I know what you're going through. I know how hard it is to balance anything in this losing battle. And unfortunately, it is a losing battle. There are no laughs immediately ahead.

But as hard as it is to figure out, you need to have a plan when it all comes crashing down. I didn't and it almost killed me. When you're loved one is all of a sudden gone, you're alone. Really alone. Everything changes. Everything. Do you have to find a new place to live? How are you planning on paying rent? Got to get a new job. Start all over. Do you have any energy left? Can you throw on that smile while all your insides are grieving more than you ever have? What skills have you forgotten while being a caregiver? There aren't as many jobs out there as you are being told.

If you're like me, you believe someone will be there to help. After all, that's all you've been doing all this time. But your best friends, your cousin who promises to be there, are all tangled in their own chaotic lives and they just don't grasp your pain. It feels like no one cares. And you will feel alone and at times, desperate.

Start laying out your plan now. Maybe another job. Maybe get another patient to look after since it's what you have the most recent skills to do. I don't know. I'm 55 and have never been where I was recently(after my mom's passing). It's the darkest most lonely place I've ever been. Dejected. Discouraged. Hopeless. This will happen unless you do something NOW!

SDianeL

FloydSnax, so sorry you are going through this. I am middle way through caring for my DH. He was diagnosed 2 years ago but may have had memory loss for as long as 8 years. I know the day will come when I have to start over but I can't bring my mind to accept and plan for that right now. Others have said to start planning now for a MC facility but I can't seem to do that either. Your words sure hit home. You are not alone. We care. Please get help and talk to someone. Stay in touch.

SDianeL

Maybe try calling the ALZ help line and see if they have any resources in your area for counseling? 800.272.3900