For better or worse, I'm back

CatsWithHandsAreTrouble

Just wanted to pop on and give an update on the goings ons with the family since I know a few on here are familiar enough with me and it's been a few months since I've posted.

Mom's now getting help from Hospice. She's mostly only taking fluids and doesn't eat solids in any real capacity. She can still ambulate but she needs either someone to support her or a really good rest (which hardly ever happens). All medication has pretty much been cut off because we couldn't reliably give them to her. She is on .5mg of Clonazepam but it doesn't seem to do much of anything. Generally she's in a good mood when she is alert but starting to show signs of sundowning again now that it's late autumn.

Dad still doesn't quite know what to do with someone with Alz but he tries. Mom's disturbed sleep has left him sleepless for a month or so. He has a hard time regulating his emotions because of that and it's taking its toll on me too.

I left the forum a few months ago very stressed out and with suicidal ideations. I am not better but I am managing better. I am doing my best to cut back the stress in my life that I can. All my time is carefully allotted for taking care of mom, working, or managing my stress and recovery.

We have an in-home aide that's been with us since August but this is their last month with us. I'm worried that once they're gone, my stress will ramp up again and I'll be back to where I was in July. I am hopeful that this feeling will never come into fruitation since things have changed so much since then. I just want my life back.

I hope all of you have been faring well and that your loved ones are safe and warm.

harshedbuzz

I am glad you updated but sorry for the toll this is taking on you.

HB

SusanB-dil

Thank you for checking-in...

Glad you have some help from hospice, but please do continue to watch our for you.

[Deleted User]

The user and all related content has been deleted.

CatsWithHandsAreTrouble

I've been depressed and anxious for most of my life so caring for someone with dementia has certainly not helped with those...

Thank you @harshedbuzz I think about you frequently. It's been a long time coming and I'm trying to stay above water.

Thanks @SusanB-dil too. I'm trying to look out for myself. Been hard since I can't seem to take care of mom and self simultaneously for a while now. I keep fighting 💪

Hi @Victoria2020 . Yes, it's a bit of an odd name to remember! Hospice currently only visits for a few hours a day a week.

@susan1955

CatsWithHandsAreTrouble

Well that's weird, I did not enter that second susan account. I cannot seem to edit it out so my apologies for the notification

Jgirl57

Thank you for the update . It’s good to hear that hospice is in the picture . Sorry you are still struggling but glad you are trying to find ways to cut stress. Every day is a new day. Hugs to you as your mom progresses on her “journey”.

Marp

So sorry you have so much on your plate? I hope you can find a solution.

Why is the caregiver leaving? Could you hire another one for even a few hours/week?

GothicGremlin

Hey there @CatsWithHandsAreTrouble I've wondered how you're doing. I'm sorry you're so stressed, but I think your approach to dealing with it is good. None of this is easy.

I'm sorry that the aide you have is leaving, but am glad to hear that hospice is on board. It should be a help for you.

CatsWithHandsAreTrouble

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/188646#Comment_188646

@Marp The aide is starting trade school this winter semester and then going to college in the spring semester. We get aides at random through an agency. They're frequently short on people.

CatsWithHandsAreTrouble

Hi @GothicGremlin I've been thinking about you and your sister. Hope things are as okay as they can be.

I wish I could cut out the biggest stressors in my life but alas, it's my parents and work and I cannot get away from them currently. So I'm just managing the smaller ones