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Dumbest or most inappropriate thing someone has said to you or your LOWD

Okay, let's find a way to get a chuckle out of the inappropriate and ridiculous comments people make to either us about our LO, or directly to our LO.

Here's a couple from my list

  1. Well they don't just tell you he has FTD and send you home, there's something they can do for it
  2. You should probably hurry and get a divorce so you can get some money out of this
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Comments

  • toolbeltexpert
    toolbeltexpert Member Posts: 1,583
    Sixth Anniversary 1000 Comments 100 Care Reactions 100 Likes
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    Hi do you know who I am?

  • fmb
    fmb Member Posts: 420
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    He's 92 years old. What do you expect? (said by his cardiologist!)

  • June45
    June45 Member Posts: 366
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    edited December 2023

    I can't count how times I heard this or something similar in my caregiving years. It sent me through the roof every time. It was all I could do to keep my mouth shut from making a snide reply like how many pairs of disposable underwear have you changed today.

  • CStrope
    CStrope Member Posts: 487
    100 Care Reactions Third Anniversary 100 Comments 25 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    Oh, and another good one I just heard this past weekend, "You remember my son, you taught him, and I know you'd remember him because he was naughty"! DH doesn't even know he was a teacher much less remember her specific naughty child!

  • Denise1847
    Denise1847 Member Posts: 856
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    Member

    "He looks good to me."

    "He seems to be doing well."

  • Babz0226
    Babz0226 Member Posts: 56
    Second Anniversary 10 Comments 5 Likes 5 Care Reactions
    Member

    Oh! DH sleeps in the the other room why? Yeah! so I can get some sleep to do what I have to do every day( I say to myself), no clue some people will never get it best to just keep things simple and talk to friends and family that do get it. Thank God they are there the people you need, and the nice people here to bounce things around --you all get it for sure and THANKS.

  • Whyzit2
    Whyzit2 Member Posts: 61
    25 Insightfuls Reactions 25 Care Reactions 25 Likes 10 Comments
    Member

    Well at least you still have your husband! Really?

  • Joe C.
    Joe C. Member Posts: 967
    Fifth Anniversary 500 Comments 100 Care Reactions 100 Likes
    Member

    There’s medication for that, you know!

  • frankay
    frankay Member Posts: 44
    Second Anniversary 10 Comments 5 Insightfuls Reactions 5 Care Reactions
    Member

    DH in wheelchair, can't communicate, incontinent and needs help with all his ADLs. Brother looked at him and said "He seems very spry". Almost bit my tongue in half.

  • Denise1847
    Denise1847 Member Posts: 856
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    Member

    So far, I think you have won the prize for the worst comment made. I am not sure what I would have done in that situation - maybe scream or walk out. I am upset just reading such an insensitive comment. I am so sorry.

  • ImMaggieMae
    ImMaggieMae Member Posts: 1,033
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    Member

    You need to worry less. Don’t sweat the small stuff.

  • Lgb35
    Lgb35 Member Posts: 93
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    Member
    1. They have medication for that now he will be fine
    2. it’s sad how it takes their memories but they body is still healthy
  • WIGO23
    WIGO23 Member Posts: 118
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    Member

    I’mMaggieMay—“You need to worry less. Don’t sweat the small stuff.”

    There Is no “small stuff” is there? Everything lost is huge because your LO is slipping away from you!

  • CStrope
    CStrope Member Posts: 487
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    Member

    I would have said, just a second, I need to google the definition of spry!

  • ghphotog
    ghphotog Member Posts: 679
    500 Care Reactions 500 Comments 100 Likes Second Anniversary
    Member

    I still don't know what to say to another person with dementia. You would think I'm an expert at this but only when it comes to my DW. I could relate to the full time caregiver, that we have in common.

  • Joydean
    Joydean Member Posts: 1,500
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    So is this one of his bad days? Said by dh’s brother who hasn’t seen him in over 4 years! Dh is now in a wheelchair, can’t speak, (except to say okay)doubt incontenint, and doesn’t understand what others are saying to him! Brother was trying to tell dh about a car and because dh had no idea, brother decided dh was having a “bad day “!

  • sawman3211
    sawman3211 Member Posts: 4
    First Comment
    Member

    What's the good thing about alzheimers? Every day you get to meet new people.

  • Chammer
    Chammer Member Posts: 149
    Eighth Anniversary 100 Comments 25 Care Reactions 25 Likes
    Member

    FIL to MILwAD when she would comment incorrectly on something: "now, C, you know that's not right." (Ummm... who has the brain problem?) And she would either roll her eyes at him and make a disgusted harumph or throw her water bottle at him.

  • Kraft44
    Kraft44 Member Posts: 5
    First Comment
    Member

    My father had MCI, which remained stable. He was 92 at the time and I brought him to his cardiologist appointment. The cardiologist was in his 60’s. He asked my father, “tell me how you’ve been doing”. My father responded, “I’ve been doing very well”. Which was the complete truth, my father was in fact doing very well. The cardiologist responded, “yeah and someday you’re gonna drop”.

  • darcytg
    darcytg Member Posts: 94
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    Member

    Can't you just leave her alone and go swim for an hour?

    Ummm, no.

  • ImMaggieMae
    ImMaggieMae Member Posts: 1,033
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    Member

    ”It’s really not any harder than caring for a toddler as a single parent.”

  • cvannor
    cvannor Member Posts: 4
    5 Care Reactions First Comment
    Member

    "Really? But he's so young!"

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more