New Member

Sally56

Thanks for letting me join this group. I belonged to an on line group and found out my sister was a member and sharing what I wrote with siblings. I felt so violated. I liked the group, most members were helpful and caring.

I'm the sole caregiver for my DH. He is 88 I'm 70. It has been the hardest task I've ever encountered. He has 5 adult children, most live out of state. One lives close by and does give me a break when it's convenient. The others, well they don't even call and when they do visit, they give maybe 4 hours of their fun filled weekend to be with Dad. They say that they're glad and thankful I take care of Dad, my reply, I bet you are. I have accepted the fact, they don't know how to care. One did ask what she could do, I said call your Dad maybe weekly or so. Well not one call. So why even tell or ask.

DH is still able dress and feed himself and find the cookies. Everything else is up to me. Housework, yard work, appointments, car repairs, driving and so many other things I can't even think of right now. Just wanted to share and that I hate this disease.

charley0419

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/67478/new-member

I feel for you, the age difference alone can make difficult. I’m 76 dw77. My wife not too bad YET! Yes it sucks

trottingalong

I’m 67, DH is 80. I’m thankful I’m younger because I at least have more energy to deal with things that come up. Most days I do pretty good. It’s the boredom that gets to me. I handle all chores, bill paying, etc. it’s difficult for me to get the deep cleaning I want to do and the yard work on our 1 acre property. I love being outdoors. My DH feels guilty he can’t help so he always wants me to hire someone for something I want to do. He also has COPD and gets out of breath easily.

Denise1847

Welcome Sally. We are glad you are here. Perhaps you have already run across posts that advise you to:

get a certified elder attorney to get your finances in order and a POA

Read the "36 hour day"

View Tam Cummings and Tepa Snow on You Tube.

Look for the post on this site entitled "the Calvary Isn't Coming."

These will help, and yes, it is a terrible disease for all involved. Stay connected and take one day at a day.

jfkoc

Another welcome!

Please make certain your sign in name is in no way revealing.

JDancer

Sally56-Welcome to our forum. My DH also has no trouble finding the cookies. Your comment made me smile, thanks for that.

Sally56

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/192018#Comment_192018

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/191980#Comment_191980

I guess we all deserve a chuckle. Thanks for the welcome.

Sally56

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/191992#Comment_191992

No way anyone could guess my user name. Thank you.

Sally56

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/191990#Comment_191990

Yes we already talked to an attorney and papers being made now.

I need to get the 36 hour book and im familiar with Teepa and I'll look up that link you shared. Can't learn enough. Thank you.

Sally56

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/191989#Comment_191989

I don't get bored, I keep busy with things I like. I paint crafty items, weave baskets and latest is creating sourdough bread. I do it all or hire someone cuz his adult son doesn't see the need. We have 10 acres and I plant a garden also.

Today is going as usual, breakfast and tv. My husband's smokes so watching lit cigs and lighter are always my worry.

Thanks for replying and hope your day is uneventful.

Sally56

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/191980#Comment_191980

It's hard cuz he was so active but not now. I'm glad I'm younger and I know he's glad too