Financial fears

Abby1567

My DH is in the earlier stages of this horrible disease. We have very good days and some not-so-good days but I know from reading all of your posts that this will get worse. I am completely committed to taking care of him until it is no longer possible. In order to do so, we have to sell our home (also a bed and breakfast) and downsize to something much smaller and easy to manage. In addition to all the other concerns involved in this new road we’re on, I’m concerned about the possibility of eventual MC and the cost involved. Can they actually take your life savings from you if the time ever comes that I would have to place him?

Some of the posts I read are so heartbreaking. I hope I can be the kind of spouse that all of you obviously are. It’s so awful to walk down this road and I’m thankful to have found this site so that I don’t have to walk down it alone.

Ed1937

Dear so scared, welcome to the forum. Sorry you need it. DO NOT sell your home/bed and breakfast until you talk to a CELA (certified elder law attorney). They can protect many assets you have. Please don't make any decisions until you talk to the attorney. They can let you know how Medicaid laws work in your state. You do not have to wind up in the poor house. You need to get this done ASAP, especially if he has good days and bad days. Hopefully just that little bit of information has lowered your stress.

LJCHR

So sorry you have a reason to join this forum but so glad it is available to us.

I would suggest you seek out a CELA (certified Elder Lawyer). There are Elder lawyers but I think better if you can find a Certified one.

We are in the process of getting all of our “ducks in a row” right now while he’s still able to participate. The sooner the better. It appears my DH may have had a small seizure a week ago and his decline is obvious.

This is a horrible disease and heartbreaking, but our only choice is to keep going and taking care of our loved one. I too pray I can keep him with me - but time will tell.

Jeanne C.

Welcome. I completely second Ed's suggestion to see a CELA first. I started working with one shortly after diagnosis and it's made a huge difference. It takes work, but I was able to protect assets, get all the legal stuff handled, and get my husband on longterm care Medicaid so he has a lot of benefits available (home health aides, medical care, even meals and incontinence supplies). Every state varies, but consult a CELA as soon as you can.

This thread has a lot of great info, including a link to the NELF site to find a CELA. Let us know how we can help. This forum is full of awesome people.

charley0419

I was told if time comes for Medicade to step in house should be in name of person NOT suffering from this. Need to contact Elder care

ghphotog

Medicaid in our state does a five year look back at assets. If I have to use Medicaid in the future they won't consider our home as an asset unless I sell it.

Please don't sell your home until you speak with a attorney that specializes in Medicaid. Most elder care attorneys do but the laws are complicated. If you sell your car within five years be sure you keep a copy of the bill of sale because medicaid will want to know how much you sold it for as well as any other assets that might have been sold within the look back period. All assets are counted whether sold or not. There are medicaid spend downs but it complex. They won't take your word on anything but they require proof documents on everything. Some elder care attorneys are better than others.

Abby1567

Thank you so much for your advice. Unfortunately, the ball is already rolling on the house sale and we’ve put an offer in on another one. I will absolutely get in touch with an elder care attorney to go over our current will and make appropriate changes. I wish I had asked months ago. I’ve never handled our finances before and I’m still trying to get a grip on everything. 😢

M1

The website that lists CELA by location is nelf.org. in addition to your wills and Medicaid planning you will need power of attorney for healthcare and finances.

upstateAnn

Even with the house sale going, see an attorney. That is the one thing I did first after accepting my DH’s disease. It cost some money but it was so worth it,

ghphotog

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/197721#Comment_197721

Please see an attoney anyway. Hopefully the sale of the home won't come back to bite you if you suspect you might have to use Medicaid assistance in a few years but an attorney can tell you more and save a some of your assets. This has been my experience with my mother. There is so much more to it than we list here.

I might have to use Medicaid myself for my DW and my attorney strongly recommened not to sell the home until the look back snapshot was over, then put the house solely in my name then I'm free to sell it if I want to. You'll need Durable Powers of Attorney as well as Medical Powers of Attorney so if your DH is still able to sign documents that is something to also take care of asap. That will prevent a ton of trouble later.

Anyway a CELA will help you with all of that.

Abby1567

Thank you! We have durable poa as well as medical so that’s all taken care of. I guess I’ll just have to see what’s coming down the road as far as the house sale and new purchase goes. I’ll go to see an attorney as soon as the sale is complete. I doubt my DH will agree to put everything in my name.

It seems that everything will be a series of problems from this point on. It’s hard to stay positive. My kids are very busy with their own families and careers. Son lives 3 hours away and daughter lives in TX across the country from us. It’s a lonely feeling……

wizmo

If you have DPOA then you can do all kinds of things in his absence after the initial transactions including quit claim on property leaving it in your name. I wouldn’t do that without legal advice; CELA will be able to guide you.

Another example is when I retired and rolled over my 401k it was considered a community asset (subject to QDRO if we were to divorce) requiring consent of DW to take any distribution. She would have no clue and is no longer able to produce a signature. I simply used POA to sign for her.

Also get a copy of a generic form called a Notary Acknowledgment which you should attach with anything you try to perform by mail as your POA may not be accepted without 3rd party verification.