Do You Talk To Yourself Out Loud As A Caregiver?
I have started talking out loud to myself (Not within DH’s hearing) both to vent about something DH has done or said and to try and calm myself. I say “it is not him, it is the disease” or “I can get through this” or even have back and forth mini-conversation with me, myself and I! Does anyone else do this? Am I losing it?
Comments
-
If you’re the only one you have to talk to at the time, I don’t see anything too unusual about that. Hey, we have to pick our sounding boards wherever we can find them, and dementia land can be a mighty lonely place. I sometimes talk to myself when I’m alone in the car on the way to the store or errands because it’s a private place. One of my favorite things to remind myself of is something I read either here or someplace else, I forget where.
“I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days is 100 percent, and that’s pretty good!”
6 -
Mom and I vented to each other. Sometimes I'd meet a friend whose mom had Alzheimer's the same time dad did and we'd compare the amusing, ridiculous and tragic over lunch.
The only talking to myself was rehearsing major fiblets. This is a trick I honed as the parent of a child with special education services— the ability to get what you need in a way that feels collaborative to the other guy.
HB2 -
I too tend to rehearse difficult conversations. My father was an attorney and later a judge, and he used to practice his trial arguments while mowing the lawn.
3 -
Now that DH is in MC, I find myself speaking out loud now and then. Just to remind myself my voice still works!
2 -
Occasionally I did talk out loud to myself. Like you, it could be a moment to vent, i.e. say something i wouldn’t allow myself to say to DH but needed to release it somehow. Seems pretty healthy to me 🩷
1 -
I talk to myself …all day long…I know I’m losing it, but it’s the only coping mechanism that helps. I try to be careful, but my DH has X-ray hearing. He hears me even when I’m 2 floors away! He’s always asking me who I’m talking to and then proceeds to tell me “it’s not normal” and maybe I need help.(haha) I tell him I’m talking to God.
I don’t have another human face in my life. So it’s me. It helps when I talk out loud with all the stuff that needs accomplished. The voiced lists helps me remember to prioritize. I also talk to deceased Mom, just because I miss her💜3 -
I think it’s normal to talk out loud to yourself. I catch myself doing it more. My sister, who lives alone, says she talks to herself all the time. She’s an extremely active, outgoing woman, but says when she’s home alone, she’s always talking.
2 -
If you are losing it, I'm right there with you.
5 -
I live alone and yes I talk to myself.
3 -
My mom used to talk to herself quite a bit. I would ask her … Mom, are you talking to yourself? She would say … Yes because I like to talk to intelligent people.
I whisper to myself a lot when frustrated, so my DH can’t hear me.
Someone on this forum asked if anyone else makes faces as they walk away from their spouse. I definitely related to that - I thought I was losing it for doing that, but was happy to know that someone else does it too. Now it just makes me laugh when I start the face making because I know someone else is doing the same thing! I just love reading all these posts - so so helpful for the big things and the small things!6 -
I talk to myself all the time!
Iris
2 -
During Covid I would make faces and stick my tongue out at DH and it was therapeutic for me. But when we no longer needed masks, that all went away.
4 -
I talk to myself, I talk to the cat, I talk to the dog. And I also catch myself doing self-chat outside of our house. I’ve officially become that crazy lady who walks around the grocery store, muttering to herself.
10 -
Thanks for the laugh!!!
3 -
I've realized that one of the reasons I like riding my e-bike is that I can talk to myself and no one can hear.
7 -
Put earphones in your ears and they think you’re having a phone conversation with someone else.
6 -
I talk to my dog who has been dead for a year…
4 -
not out loud….so far…lol
1 -
I'd talk to myself all the time in the car, usually giving myself pep talks - You can do this! Five hours in memory care and then you have the evening off! - stuff like that.
Sometimes I'd rehearse difficult conversations.
Sometimes if I was having a particularly loopy conversation with Peggy, I'd turn around so that I wasn't facing her, and I'd make the scream face 😱 just for a second, and then face Peggy again with my happy face. Which I guess doesn't technically fall under "talking to yourself" … but I kind of put it in the same box.
4 -
ALL the time! And yes, I answer. Even when other people are around. I think I always have, but definitely more now that my DH is largely non-verbal.
3
Commonly Used Abbreviations
DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more
Categories
- All Categories
- 477 Living With Alzheimer's or Dementia
- 241 I Am Living With Alzheimer's or Other Dementia
- 236 I Am Living With Younger Onset Alzheimer's
- 14.2K Supporting Someone Living with Dementia
- 5.2K I Am a Caregiver (General Topics)
- 6.9K Caring For a Spouse or Partner
- 1.9K Caring for a Parent
- 158 Caring Long Distance
- 107 Supporting Those Who Have Lost Someone
- 11 Discusiones en Español
- 2 Vivir con Alzheimer u Otra Demencia
- 1 Vivo con Alzheimer u Otra Demencia
- 1 Vivo con Alzheimer de Inicio Más Joven
- 9 Prestación de Cuidado
- 2 Soy Cuidador (Temas Generales)
- 6 Cuidar de un Padre
- 22 ALZConnected Resources
- View Discussions For People Living with Dementia
- View Discussions for Caregivers
- Discusiones en Español
- Browse All Discussions
- Dementia Resources
- 6 Account Assistance
- 16 Help